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Old 09-08-2010, 09:13 AM   #21
naruto_jock
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Default Re: Love Story

Chapter 2: Butterflies

Spoiler:
Now that I made my bet with Freddy, I'm just thinking about how I'm going to meet this girl. Let alone ask her out.
As I walk into the school, I just decide to take in this moment that this is my last year in high school. I'm a senior dammit! I'm the top dog right now. But right when I'm about done looking into the halls I've been walking through for the past 3 years, something catches my eye. It's the girl I need to hunt down. Her back is still facing towards me, so I'm really wondering what this girl looks like. I mean, just because she looks alright from the back doesn't mean she has the goods in the front right? What? Is that so horrible to think? I know a lot of people that aren't the cream of the crop you know? And I know how it's all about 'Who you are in the inside" and I totally believe that......but I want that extra something from a girl. I guess that's why I haven't had a date in a long time. I'm too damn picky....then again it's better to be single and have your sanity than be dating a self-centered chick and lose your man hood.
Anyway, I try to come up to walk up to the girl to give her my 'Oh you're new here? I'm Johnny boy, beautiful. What's your name baby girl?" routine, but all these damn freshmen get in my way. Now the mystery girl is about 15 feet in front of me. I just decide to talk to her after school.....but the unexpected happens. Instead of going down one of the other halls, she keeps on walking down the senior hall. I think to myself, "Wow, Freddy was right on how she's in our grade. I guess I'll have to give him something during lunch."
I keep walking behind the girl in hopes of at least knowing where her home room is, but she walks in my home room class as well. Just my luck I guess then.
She enters our home room and I soon follow. Her back is still facing me, so I'm really getting nervous and start getting mental pictures of her being not so great. Right when she turns around to sit in her desk, I walk right past her.....and the most unexpected happens. I absolutely stop in my tracks in awe of just how beautiful this girl is. The first thing I notice about this girl is how her eyes grab my attention immediately. Her eyes are of an amber hue that seem to sparkle all the time. I soon notice how she seems to have this expression in her eyes that tells me she's very shy around people, at the same time confident in herself. I see how her face has all these nice curves that come down her cheeks that go down to her mouth. The lush of her lips are purely natural, without the help of any lip gloss or anything. I then see how there are bangs coming down the sides of her face that end at her cheeks.
As I'm just thinking about how beautiful she is, I get this funny feeling that everyone in the room is watching me. I break out of my glance and see everyone looking at me. I wonder what is happening, and then I start hearing something that almost sounds too pure to be a woman's voice. I look around and see the mystery girl's lips moving, where I finally hear "Uh, is there something you want from me? Or are you just one of those weirdos in every school?" As soon as I hear this, I feel the whole room fill up with laughter at the mystery girl's comment. Blushing crazily, I quickly sit in a desk in the back.
I think to myself, "Smooth Johnny boy.....really smooth." I hang my head in embarrassment, and notice one more thing. The pit in my stomach is gone, but there's something new........
"Butterflies?" I ask myself. "Why the hell would I get that?" Thinking about what's happening, the school day begins with the ringing of the tardy bell and with the teacher calling out roll call with this week's announcements.


Well, that is Chapter 2 of the series. I hoped you all liked it.
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Old 09-08-2010, 09:46 AM   #22
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Default Re: Love Story

Hmm just a tad confused at first i thought he was only suppose to ask her out if he lost the bet and this point he didn't, but it seems he is focused to ask her out?

Anyways i like this chapter alot i liked how you described her and the awkward moment between Johnny and her made me laugh sounds like sometin that happened to me lol
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Old 09-08-2010, 09:48 AM   #23
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Default Re: Love Story

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ohako View Post
Hmm just a tad confused at first i thought he was only suppose to ask her out if he lost the bet and this point he didn't, but it seems he is focused to ask her out?

Anyways i like this chapter alot i liked how you described her and the awkward moment between Johnny and her made me laugh sounds like sometin that happened to me lol
Asking her out means just for a date. That's what we say here and I'm sorry if there's any culture clash right there.

Thank you!! I thought that would be a good twist to add since she looks one thing when she has now acted kind of the opposite. I just hope it's alright for now. XDDD
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Old 09-08-2010, 09:51 AM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by naruto_jock View Post
Asking her out means just for a date. That's what we say here and I'm sorry if there's any culture clash right there.

Thank you!! I thought that would be a good twist to add since she looks one thing when she has now acted kind of the opposite. I just hope it's alright for now. XDDD
OOO i understand

Yes its better then alright keep it up. So far it is a reflection of my senior year lol jk
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Old 09-08-2010, 09:52 AM   #25
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Default Re: Love Story

Thx Ohako.
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Old 09-09-2010, 08:53 AM   #26
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Default Re: Love Story

Chapter 3: The Munchies


Spoiler:
With the great start that I've made with the mystery girl, I think it's safe to say I'll have to do a lot of damage control to at least salvage the remaining school year.
I try to get through all my classes by just not talking as much. The only problem with my classes is how I'm in the same class with the girl, so there's already an aura of awkwardness. All I do is watch where this girl is sitting and I make sure I'm on the other side of the room.
It's lunch time and as soon as I sit down to eat, Freddy just pops up with an anime grin on his face.


"I've heard everything is going well for you Romeo. So where's the date going to be at? Movies? Fancy restaurant? Or both Don Juan?"]
"I see the social network of Alpharetta is still working. Who told you?"
"Oh, I didn't need anyone to tell me. I just saw it on my phone. Already on youtube man. You're quite the star now. It's only been 4 hours since the video was posted you already have 1,000 visits. I consider that an achievement for you."
"IT'S ON YOUTUBE?!?!?!?!.....And do I really have that many visits already? Does the title of the vid at least sound good?"
"Oh no.....I would strongly suggest you not watching it. It might be awkward for you."
"/sighs......Well, I might just give up on the bet to be honest with you. She doesn't seem to be worth any of my time. She already sounds like one of the prissy brats we got here."
"Oh no Johnny boy. You're going to ask this girl out. Bet's a bet. If you don't at least ask her out I will give you holy hell through out this school year. And you know how my pranks can send you to a mental asylum."
"I still think it was horrible how you put fake spiders in Billy's locker last year that launched out as soon as the locker opens. I still can't figure out how you did it."
"If I told you how I did it, I would have to kill you."
"Yeah yeah yeah secret agent man. You don't have to tell me your dark, evil ways. But fine, I'll ask her out at the end of school."
"That's the ticket Johnny boy. Now if you don't mind, I have been eyeing Kelly and it seems like she worked out a lot during the summer. I think it's time to officially start the school year for me."
"You really are a lady killer at heart. Aren't you?"
"Well, who do you think the man in your girl's life, before you, was like? I'm that dude that sets up the future marriage couple. I consider this a service to all men. So respect my game Johnny boy."
"You're horrible...."

As me and Freddy eat and laugh, I get this feeling that there might be some sparks flying after school. And I'm going to be the one that lights it up.

That was chapter 3. Sorry if it's short. I'll make sure the next chapter is longer. I hope you like it.
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Old 09-10-2010, 03:00 PM   #27
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Default Re: Love Story

write the 4th.... lol whenever convenient for you
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Old 09-11-2010, 02:02 PM   #28
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Default Re: Love Story

Good story
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Old 09-12-2010, 06:34 PM   #29
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Default Re: Love Story

Good job. I really like this and it's easy to remember also. Sometimes Im reading a story.. and I keep forgetting how the story went etc. This is reading very easily and it's entertaining
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Old 09-13-2010, 10:46 AM   #30
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Default Re: Love Story

Chapter 4: Accidents

Spoiler:
After my social lunch with Freddy, I can't help but think how I'm way in over my head. I mean, how can I ask this girl out when there has been so much drama already? I'm just trying to get through the motions and try to get this bet over with.
I make it through my other classes without any drama happening and it's now P.E. Our P.E. coach, or just Coach to the football players, had the whole class run around the track to see how out of shape we became from summer vacation. As everyone in my class is jogging around the track, I see the mystery girl going around the track. I notice how she's jogging around by herself and I decide that this is the perfect time to ask her. As I jog up beside her, I just say "Hi," and I hear this sudden scream. It comes from the girl and I notice there is a look in her eye that says how she was in sheer terror. Once I saw that look in her eye, all I saw next was pitch darkness. When I wake up, I notice I'm on the nurse's bed with a monster head ache. As I'm laying down I see the mystery girl sitting right next to me. On instinct, I flinch away from her and she says:

"Oh don't worry. I won't hurt you...this time. I'm sorry about what happened."
"Now what exactly happened miss? All I remember was saying 'Hi' to you and now I'm in the nurse's office."
"Yeah, well.....Let's just say that you came up from behind me and I got...uh...spooked. And I accidentally hit you."
"Hold on. Whenever you get spooked, you suddenly drop that person on their head? Man, I would hate to see you when you're angry."
"Yeah, you really don't want to see me when I'm angry. It can get ugly. Hehe."
"You ugly? I would find that very hard to believe miss."
"Well, I guess you've already seen me when I'm ugly Mr. Cool. Hehe."
"So you still remember me from this morning? I guess this makes everything a little more awkward, huh?"
"No....well....knowing how you did that and how I decked you on the track....I would guess we would be even."
"Now I wouldn't say that miss. The least you can do for decking me and giving me such a horrible injury is give me your name and go out on a date with me."
"You really are bold man, aren't you?"
"I only make bold moves when I notice when beautiful women, such as yourself, won't be on the market for long."
"And you're a charmer?I got to admit Mr. Joe Cool, I'm impressed with your game so far."
"That's the problem though miss, this isn't a game. This is how I treat women such as yourself. With respect and kindness......Now what is your name? Cause if you don't give it, I'll have to come up with a name for you."
"Oh really Mr. Cool? And what name would that be?"
"Well, right now it's at a dead-lock between 'Beautiful' or 'Perfect'. And you know you can't make me choose one over the other since you are both miss."
"Well how about I do this? I'll accept your date, but I'll only tell you my name if I have a good time. Deal?"
"Fine with me Beautiful. When and where should I pick you up?"
"Don't worry, I'll call you."
"But I don't have your number Beautiful."
"It's not a problem. I already put it in your phone while you were still out of it."
"So is the number under your name? Or will I have to seperate it from all the other girls' numbers I have?"
"You won't have to. You'll know which one it is."
"Okay then. My name is John. It was a pleasure meeting you miss."
"The pleasure was mine, John. See ya tonight then."
"See ya tonight."

After my conversation with Beautiful, she leaves the room. I only see her back once again and notice how she's now walking with a strut that shows her being happy. I can only think to myself how in I am and how this will be a piece of cake.
After Beautiful leaves the nurse's office, I decide it's time for me to go as well. I say good bye and thank her for helping me out. As I'm in the hallway, I check my cell phone which number Beautiful gave me and the name says "Whoops! Sorry sexy. " I can't help but think how much this girl drives me crazy. Now I just need to find a babysitter for Evelyn for tonight now. I guess Freddy can learn how to be a father tonight then.



Here's chapter 4. I hope you like it.
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Old 09-13-2010, 05:07 PM   #31
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Default Re: Love Story

It is ... so... happy! T.T
/happytears
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Old 09-13-2010, 05:08 PM   #32
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Thank you Kiseki!!! I really appreciate your support.
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Old 09-13-2010, 05:27 PM   #33
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No problem. I like it so far, but don't make it too happy.
Otherwise it becomes kinda.. unrealistic?! XD
All the girls will be like DAYUM.. I wish that guy was hitting on me like that @.@
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Old 09-14-2010, 12:47 PM   #34
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Default Re: Love Story

But isn't that the whole point? To have women wanting to have a man like that? But they won't have to look far since I'm like that. /kidding

____________________________________________


Chapter 5: The Dark Night

Spoiler:
I get out of the nurse's office and I'm walking to my car, when I hear this loud tumbling sound from behind me. When I turn around to see what it was, I get tackled on the ground and it's no other than Freddy.

"What happened?!?! I heard all about it and couldn't believe it, so I came to you and see what happened."
"Well first, can you get off of me? This kind of looks weird that you're on top of me."

"Why are you like that? I thought you always wanted to me to be on top sugar?"
"No....no....and hell no. I only like women on top man. Not you."
"Don't worry about it man. I was only preparing ya for the up coming season anyway. You passed."
"Well that's great to hear that I got the okay from one of the only players that doesn't tackle on the field. Mr. Quarterback."
"Yeah yeah yeah, but you have to tell me everything man. Did she really drop you on your head?"
"It was more of a crouching tiger, hidden dragon move. I didn't even see it coming."
"Wow....that's pretty hawt when a woman can take out a man like that. You should keep her after this date."
"I might......anyway, how did you know I was able to get the date with her? I thought me and her were alone together in the nurse's room?"

"I didn't know you got the date. I just wanted to hear it from you, that's all."
"Very coi of you to do that Freddy. Anyway since I'm going on this date, I'll need someone to look after Evelyn. Can you take care of her?"
"What do I look like to you? Mr. Father-Figure here? I don't even know how to take care of myself, let alone a child!"

"I'm not asking you take full responsibility of my sister man. I'm just asking you if she can stay with you while I'm gone. Doesn't your mom like taking care of kids anyway? Let her help you out."
"I guess I could do that then. Okay, Evee can stay with me while you're gone lover boy."
"It's only a date Freddy. It ain't like I'm going to spend forever with this chick."
"Yeah yeah yeah, but it should be fun for you.....right?"
"I hope so."

After my talk with Freddy, I get in my car and drive over to the day care to pick up my baby sister. I get Evee and we both go home. With my usual routine, I place little Evee in her favorite chair and fix her a bottle of warm milk. I get the bottle of milk and pick up my baby sister and sit on the couch our family has had for a long time. I feed her the milk and turn on the TV to check out the news and weather for tonight. When I do stuff like this, I have conversations with Evee because it seems to help me clear my head. Not only that, but it's also to keep my mind how lame I am for checking this type of stuff out. I mean, what 18 year old checks out the news and weather? Anyway, I'm feeding Evee her bottle and I just start to ramble on:

"Yeah Evee, it was a rough day at school today. Had to ask this girl out that turned out to be an underground kick-boxer. She decked me out and I was sent to the nurse's office today. I'm alright now, but she seems to be alright. I really can't put my finger on this girl yet. Weird, huh?"
"....../suck-suck"
"I know it's not right to have to ask out a girl like that, but I made a bet with Freddy and you know how he is if you don't do something."
"......../suck-suck"

"Don't worry, I'll try to make it a good night for both of us. So, how was the day-care today? Did you make any friends today?"
"......./suck-suck"

"Yes, I know you like little Gary, but he might turn out to be a bad boy. Would you like to do go out with that?"
"........./suck-suck"

"It's alright. As long as he makes you happy and treats you right, I'll support it."
"........./suck-suck"
"What's the mystery girl's name? Well, I really don't know. But if I show her a good time she'll tell me. She already thinks I'm sexy, which I don't want you to say that to a man until you're 18, so I think she already likes me. What do you think?"
"........./suck-suck"
"Exactly what I was thinking about. Where do you think I should take her? The movies? Or a nice restaurant?"

"......../suck-suck"
"Both?! I guess that's an option. How about I ask her when I pick her up?"
"......./suck-suck"
"That's a good idea little one. Oh, looks like your done with your bottle. Thanks for talking with my Evee."
"......./suck-suck"


After Evee finishes her bottle, I rock her back-and-forth to have her take her nap. Once she falls asleep, I put her in her crib and take the time to do some homework. As I'm about done with my last assignment, my phone rings. It's her. I answer the phone and say:

"Hello?"

"Hmm, and I thought you wouldn't answer. I guess this means we're still on for tonight, right?"
"Only if you still want to, miss."
"I'll see if your skills only end with talking and picking up girls."
"If I'm not mistaken, that almost sounds like you want to be entertained tonight miss."
"I only want to be entertained by a man that can walk-the-walk, when he can talk-the-talk."

"Alright then, where should I pick you up?"
"Y-you want to pick me up?!"

"Uh, yeah. Isn't that supposed to be the guy's job in a date? To pick up the girl he asked out?"
"I-i-i mean of course you are! I knew that."
"Okay. So where should I pick you up?"
"At 285 Concord Drive. You can't miss the house."

"Alright, I'll be there in 45 minutes then."
"Okay John. See ya soon."

After my phone call with mystery girl, I know I have to take my "Dating Ritual." I first take my shower, brush my teeth, iron out my clothes, put on some cologne, and say a prayer for a good night. I pick up Evee and put her in the car to take her to Freddy's house before the date.
I drop off Evee and go off to my date.
I arrive at the address that mystery girl sent me, and she was definetely right. I could never miss that house. It was basically one of your many mansions found in Alpharetta but this one made the other ones looks like bungalos. It had 6 white columns in the front, with an all brick finish for the outside of the house and had a nice stair case leading to the front door from the drive way; since the house was on a slope.
I park my car in the drive way and automatically an alarm goes off. I get out of my car to check if I haven't hit anyone's car and the next thing I notice is a man with and 12-gage come out ready to shoot.

"Who the hell is it?!"
"Uh....it's me......John. I'm your daughter's date tonight?"

"Oh, so you're John. Well, come on in then sir."

Nearly scared crapless, I just go along with what the man says. I don't want piss him off or anything.
I walk into the house and the father says:

"My name is Harold Duffy. You can call me Mr. Harold if you want to."
"It's alright Mr. Duffy. I have too much respect for you already to call you that."

"Aaa, I'm sorry for scaring you boy. I have to do that since that day happened."
"Uh, if I may ask sir. What do you mean 'that day' exactly?"
"Well, since you're going out on a date with my daughter, you should at least know that she-"
"You will do no such thing Harold Duffy!!!! Hi, I'm Mrs. Duffy. You can call me Jess if you like."
"Umm, it's alright Mrs. Duffy. I also have too much respect for you too already to call you that ma'am."
"Wow, such a gentleman. Did you learn such great manners from your parents?"
"Yes ma'am, I did. They taught me that respect is something you should always give to everyone."

"You see Harold! We need to have our daughter dating more boys like this gentleman."
"C'mon Jess?! You know that this boy might be respectful now and abuse our trust later on like the last one."

"Yeah well, I get a feeling he's different. Totally not like that boy-"
"And you won't say that boy's name again when I'm under the same house!!! Mother!!!"


I turn around and I see how the mystery girl had that similar face on the track. Who was this other boy and what exactly did he do to this beautiful woman? As she comes down the stair case, she comes straight towards me and says:

"Me and John are leaving right now. We're going to have a dinner and a movie. Then, we're going to take walk in the park. So please don't bother us, Mom? Daddy?"
"Alright sweet-pea. We promise to not bother you. Right Harold?"
"Alright then, but I want you to text me everytime you go somewhere. Okay?"
"Alright Daddy. Bye now."
"Bye Mr. and Mrs. Whaaa-!!!"


I get dragged along before I can say my good byes to Mr. and Mrs. Duffy. They really seem to be either great parents, or really weird. But I can already tell that this girl is going to be a hassle with that act she pulled right there. She didn't even let me offer what to do tonight either.
As we leave her neighborhood, she just grabs my hand and says:

"I'm sorry you had to hear all that back there. My parents really do worry about who I date and sometimes won't let me go on a date unless I act like that. I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable."

Utterly shocked from such a response, I can't help but smile and reply:

"It's alright. At least you have parents that care for you. Mine are.....well. Let's just not talk about that now. Shall we?"

"Sure. As long as you don't ask me that question."
"What question? The question about your name?"
"No....about the boy my parents were talking about."

Once she said that, I remember how I had all those questions about this boy. What the hell did he do to her to make it to where it's taboo for this woman and her family?

"That's cool. I wasn't really thinking about it until you brought it up."
"Yeah yeah, don't try to play it off. I know you were thinking about it. Just don't bring it, okay? I really want to have a good time tonight."
"And why is that? So that you can tell me your name?"
"Maybe.....but I won't tell."

"It's alright. I won't matter what happens because I'll get that name by the end of the night."
"We'll see."

As me and my date drive off into the dark night, I get this sudden feeling that I'm going to have something happen to me that will change my life forever.


Well, that is Chapter 5. I hope you like it.
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Old 09-14-2010, 04:57 PM   #35
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Default Re: Love Story

Great chapter Naruto, hmm i wonder what her name is?
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Old 09-14-2010, 06:06 PM   #36
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Default Re: Love Story

Quote:
"Well first, can you get off of me? This kind of looks weird that you're on top of me."
"Why are you like that? I thought you always wanted to me to be on top sugar?"
Do I sence a little forum humor trolling loving thing going on?! XD

Quote:
"........./suck-suck"
This is an instant reminder of the Simpsons.

Quote:
"Uh....it's me......John. I'm your daughter's date tonight?"
Wow, mister i-has-no-manners.
Thank goodness he corrects it later on, haha.

Quote:
"C'mon Jess?!
Herbert the pervert daddy! o-o

Awesome! I can imagine this being a korean drama! <3
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Old 09-15-2010, 02:04 PM   #37
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ohako View Post
Great chapter Naruto, hmm i wonder what her name is?
Thx man for following it. I'm still figuring out her name too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiseki View Post
Do I sence a little forum humor trolling loving thing going on?! XD


This is an instant reminder of the Simpsons.


Wow, mister i-has-no-manners.
Thank goodness he corrects it later on, haha.


Herbert the pervert daddy! o-o

Awesome! I can imagine this being a korean drama! <3
You got my Maggie cameo. Rep for you! XD
And thank you for reading all the chapters. I really appreciate it Kiseki.
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Old 09-15-2010, 07:41 PM   #38
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Default Re: Love Story

My bestie deserves all the attention ^-^
Thanks so much for the rep btw!
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Old 09-18-2010, 08:59 AM   #39
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Default Re: Love Story

I loved that girl over there! ;D
I also loved the jokes you put in the story here and there. It made it entertaining and more interesting to read.

It was a little hard to read since you typed the story in YELLOW, but being a goodie-good fangirl, I read all of the chapters. ^-^

PS: I didn't know you had such talents! :o
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Old 09-18-2010, 10:14 PM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by naruto_jock View Post
Of course man. Us asian people dont' get enough looks in Hollywood anyway so I have to get some time of air time, right?
Thx man.
Hell yeah my Asian Brother. XD
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