Marked (fanfiction by Ryaque)

[Ryaque]

Thanks for the comments, but I think I'm just gong to give up on this on guys. I've lost my imspiration to write it. It seems all my Fanfictions keep failing so what's the point?

[takuya]

Because there are fans out there who think you're doing good and want more.

[Ryaque]

Originally Posted by takuya

Because there are fans out there who think you're doing good and want more.

Yeah right....

[Larry01239]

You are simply posting it in the wrong place. Go to fanfiction.net or fictionpress.net

[takuya]

Originally Posted by Ryaque

Yeah right....

It's true. I enjoy reading your story.

[Ryaque]

Good news everyone! I've finally been able to get over my writer's block am now working on the newest chapter! Thank you for being so pacient with me! (I may have spelled that wrong BTW but I don't care! Mwuahahahaha!)

[takuya]

You're welcome and I really hope that isn't an evil laugh. *hides in fear*

[Ryaque]

Eleven:

Rin swore under her breath and flew up into the air to dodge. The kid's demon blood is surfacing. She's hungry. Opening her palm, a whip of flames appeared and burned hungrily, yearning for flesh to burn. "Sorry kid," Rin whispered and struck.
I laughed evilly and back-flipped and easily dodged the whip. My entire body coursed with power; waves of darkness surrounded me and my teeth grew even longer as my eyes began to burn. Once again, I felt like I was watching my body from somewhere far away. Watching in terror, I saw my black hair grow wildly and whip around in a sudden gust of wind that was not there before. My skin was even paler then normal, and my eyes were the same yellow as all the other demons I had seen. My blood grew cold as ice when I saw my fangs and my nails elongated to become almost talon-like and dangerously sharp. I remember Rin, or Ryaque, whoever it was telling me I wouldn't survive the transformation from human to demon, and something told me if I didn't regain control, my life would end here and now.
Rin flew faster then any human eyes could follow, but my body with newly gained demon eyes followed easily. She flew around me faster and faster, flames burned all around me till I realized what she was doing. A cyclone of flames! As Rin flew faster and faster, my body gasped for air. It felt as though someone had their hands around my neck and squeezed so I couldn't breathe. I gasped and sputtered, feeling like I was being crushed under the useless, heavy nothingness that was left after the air was gone. Black dots swam in my vision and I almost fainted, but then I heard a sound that was alien to me yet soothing. The sound of something enchanting...
"Rin, is that anyway to treat a guest?" A voice called out as the sound grew more powerful and seemed to crash into the flames in powerful waves before receeding to attack once again.
Rin smirked and the cyclone of flames vanished, the only hint it was ever there was the thick scorch marks all around me. "Never thought you'd be here, Demetra."
Suddenly, I turned to see a woman step out of the shadows with a violin hanging by her side and the bow to play it over her shoulder. A small primate sat on her other shoulder and looked at me with pale yellow eyes. A demon monkey?
The woman Rin addressed as Demetra turned and whispered to the monkey on her shoulder and suddenly it leapt and turned into an ape the size of a monster truck!
Rin sneered at it and waved dismissively, "fine Emmy, you take her."
The ape, Emmy, giggled and with tenderness that didn't match such a huge beast, lifted me into his massive arm and craddles me like a new born baby. With a sudden feeling if dizziness, I was pulled back into my body and almost vomited.
"Why did you interfere? I had everything under control." Rin hissed.
"Like hell you did. You were killing her. Emmy, take care of her please." Demetra called lovingly to the ape then turned and walked towards the mountains.
Rin mumbled under her breath and followed.
My body felt exhausted, like I had just run a marathon, and I let the sleep overtake me, praying in my dreams I wouldn't see the monster I was becoming.

[takuya]

Becoming only has one "m", same with mumbled. Nice chapter. That is one odd demon monkey, and I wonder what they mean by "take care of" Audriana.

[Ryaque]

Originally Posted by takuya

Becoming only has one "m", same with mumbled. Nice chapter. That is one odd demon monkey, and I wonder what they mean by "take care of" Audriana.

Emmy is awesome!! *giggles* He's a total goof-ball, you'll see that in later chapters, and nothing evil or bad is going to happen to Audriana. In this case, it's meant by "take care of her and make sure she gets something to eat." Also, thanks for catching those mistakes.

[takuya]

You're welcome. I'm make sure to point out more if I find more. Also, I thought from the name Emmy that Emmy was a girl. Anyway, that's good I guess. Not for what she's gonna "eat", but yeah.

[Ryaque]

Originally Posted by takuya

You're welcome. I'm make sure to point out more if I find more. Also, I thought from the name Emmy that Emmy was a girl. Anyway, that's good I guess. Not for what she's gonna "eat", but yeah.

*laughs* Emmy is a guy yes, and don't worry about what she's going to eat. Unless you're volunteering?

[takuya]

I'm not offering! You do not let friends be eaten by other friends!