A Serious Thread
 

About how I feel. I've talked to many people over the years who say, "It's just an online naruto forum." or, "This place isn't that important.". And for all intents and purposes, yes, they are absolutely right. That IS what this place is. Maybe to them. Maybe to others.

But that's not how I feel. This place is a home to me. Almost a second family to me. I came here almost 4 years ago, and back then, I was a kid. Some would say I still am now. But over those years, I've matured, and become wiser. I've met some wonderful people, and learned many irreplaceable things. It's somewhere absolutely precious to me that holds memories I couldn't get rid of even if I wanted to. It's a place I want to protect, and a place I would love to make better however I could.

That being said, people often ask me why this place makes me so stressed out. And I'll be honest, it's mostly my fault. If not entirely. This place isn't somewhere that SHOULD make me stressed, but it does. For every upside it brings me, it's come with a down, but that's something I can, and will deal with every day I come here. But as of now, you could say I'm having a "mid-life crisis" of sorts in regards to the forum. I feel like my time here is slowly dwindling, and yet, for the 4 years I've been here, and all the things I've done, and others have done for me.... I feel as if I've accomplished nothing. I have aspirations to become a mod here. To be an S-mod. And hell, even a Quasi. And I've done none of those things. I've wanted to win MotM, from the very first month it came out. Not for the prizes, or the perks. Not even the respect really. I want to feel accomplished. Like I've DONE something. I want to feel like my place here has worth, which is something I haven't honestly had in a long time.

So if you all think that I may get serious, or worked up, I just want you to know, just slightly why. I want to give you a serious understanding and outlook as to my behaviors. And don't get confused, I'm not leaving, nor do I really have any intention to. I don't think I could if I wanted to.

Another thing, something more personal. I'm an ass, yes. I'm a jerk, and I rarely have a problem with it. I have an ego as well. A massive ego. I often think of myself as absolutely superior to many of you. But I for each of those thoughts, there is another telling me that I'm not. That I'm not as smart, that I'm not as talented, or anything else. And really, those are my true thoughts. I'm not anything special. I'm not a super-genius like Maik, or someone as charming as Magic. Hell, I can't even be as lamely charismatic as Dev, even if I tried. And yet, I do try. Some would say I try too hard to be good. To be better. To be SOMETHING. I'm having a heart to heart with all of you. And I don't expect many of you to care, or respond. I don't want that. If even one of you were to read all of this, and understand, I'll have done all I wanted.

Ultimately, I just wanted you all to know who I am. And now you know. Inb4the tl;dr and cool story bro.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

i feel you!

Re: A Serious Thread
 

This

For the most part I've learned a lot things, especially writing skills by participating on this forum. Although my grammar is still very bad :lol:

edit; nocky don't feel that way, I could write up paragraphs about why some of things you feel are false and shallow.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

Don't know you all that well but you can try to be more helpful so you can MOTM so you can feel accomplished. But you shouldn't be fulfilled with only that because you have been here for a while so you have to have done something memorable. Right?

Re: A Serious Thread
 

I could make a thread alone detailing all the things I've learned from Toma.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

Re: A Serious Thread
 

*hugs*
I suppose, but it's not something I can really..."help". I can't take it easy because I'm emotionally invested.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

Tl;dr

Re: A Serious Thread
 

I know your feel...

This forum is practically my home, it's hard to go to another one...

Re: A Serious Thread
 

mad respect.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

I haet u.
http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/...png?1318992465

@Vex

Don't worry, it's not for respect. I'm just glad you read it honestly.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

Text walls scare me off since, the first thing I think with them is oh no some things bad with someone.
Screw what people think just do what you do and say what you want. Within some okay manner. I guess?
People can think what they like and it's guaranteed that a lot of people wouldn't really know why you said it or even understand why you feel like that because they're not you.
I read that wall though..
Don't you just hate it when you have to explain yourself with things, tch..

Re: A Serious Thread
 

It doesn't bother me. I'd rather people know about me, then be left thinking I'm some obsessive egotistical assface.

Besides, it wasn't really a justification. It was informational.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

Boy can i make a lot of reasons for this thread, a lot of analysis and reverse psychology reasons, and all of em possible and correct lol.

But putting that aside, haviing a strong personality isnt bad, even if it tends to be more rude than nice, both personalities have good sides and bad sides... I don't have anything against you, and you probably don't even know me ;P But ik the feeling of not being able to leave a certain place, some places just get stuck in your heart.

Also, for those who say you aren't mature and stuff like that... There is only 1 thing i can say, its true that being younger does make you a little bit not mature due to a simple reason, if you are young then there a lot of things you dont know, and because you dont know them you end up looking immature no matter how much you try "looking" mature... But that also gives you respect from other people... When you grow up though that reputation grows and you truly become mature...

And being immature in itself isnt a bad thing as long as it doesnt end up with flaming, and doing pretty much all the things that shouldnt be done to a person you meet in real life. Being immature also means that you tend to have more fun than the "completely mature" people out there.

I dont know how old you are nor do i need to know, i judge people by their actions and not their age... So from a friendly user on the forum, its nice to meet you (since you dont know who i am lol) ;)

Re: A Serious Thread
 

I get what you mean mate. I'm glad you know I was joking. =P
True words... true words. ;D

Re: A Serious Thread
 

If anyone were to seriously respond with that, I'd throat punch them. :lol:

Re: A Serious Thread
 

*warning: cliche, out-of-character comment inbound*

I just wanna say that you shouldn't need MotM to feel accomplished on here. Heck, just about anybody here that knows you knows how much you contribute to making this place awesome. Your wit, your knowledge and skill on RP's (yes, I'll check em out, even though I don't do em myself), and even the times when you're an ass make everybody's time on the forum better and brighter. Except for the poor fool who sparks your inner rage. Anyway, whether you achieve any physical title on here or not, it's clear as (insert clear thing here) how much you've actually accomplished for yourself, for the forum itself, and for everybody who knows you on here. I haven't been on here nearly as long as you, but still, it's been a good four years and here's to even more great, Noctis-filled days on here!

Re: A Serious Thread
 

I really don't know how to honestly respond to this.

<333333

But I have goals, and I'll try my hardest to get there.

Re: A Serious Thread
 

I don't know you or don't think I've ever talked to you but why do you feel the need to be MOTM or a MOD? Do you really need those things just to feel like your 4 years here have been worth it? Surely the friends you say you made here is enough to make you realise your time here has not all been wasted?

Re: A Serious Thread
 

Don't really know you.. I do know of you. Seen you around a lot, but never spoken to you. So basically, I can't say much, but I don't think MotM will make you seem anymore accomplished to me personally. It might make you "feel" more special, give you a boost in confidence.. but it's just a temporary high I'm sure. I was just happy to be nominated for the first (and probably last) time. :lol: I've made some great friends here and I hope to keep them for a very long time. That's all that matters to me now. Nothing on here should be taken so seriously. Enjoy yourself! ;D

Oh yeah.. regarding Magic... he's one of a kind. Mmmm, dat Magic P: <3 hahahaha