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Cyl
07-31-2009, 05:09 PM
Characters (Contains Spoilers!)

Kyousei Ichibun


Kyousei Ichibun
Age: 13
Birthdate: August 27th
blood type: O
Gender: Male
Height: 172 cm
Loyalty: Yamagakure




Appearance
Kyousei has long black hair and blue eyes, he wears blue shorts, black sandals, he wears a white shirt and a black jacket, The Jacket it unzipped so you can see his shirt. He is taller than Yukida, and he's kind of slim.



Yukida Kirosane

Yukida Kirosane
Age: 16-17
Birth date October: 12
Blood type: AB
Classification: Medical-nin
Gender: Female
Height: 161 cm
Loyalty: Yamagakure
Rank: Chunin
Weight: 45.5kg

Appearance: Yukida has long (longer than kyousei's) bright yellow hair. She wears yellow skin tights all over her body and a Pink shirt with no sleeves over this. She wears yellow sandals, and she is shorter than Uruyad and Kyousei. She is undoubtedly the prettiest girl in Yamagakure, with yellow eyes. She is not only noticed for her strength and healing jutsu, but her looks.
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Team
Unknown (Will be revealed after the arc when Kyousei leaves.)
__________________________________

_________________________________
LIKES
__________________________________________________ ____________________
Favorite colors: Yellow, pink
Favorite foods: syrup-coated red bean paste dumplings, umeboshi, and anmitsu
Hobbies: Playing trivia and memorization
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Dislikes the colors green and red.
Dislikes anything spicy.
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JUTSU
(medical jutsu, Unknown)
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Chakra Natures
(unknown)
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Notes: Is secretly in-love with the rogue ninja (now Yamakage) Kyousei Ichibun


Uruyad Sudatsume

Uruyad Sudatsume (sue-dat-soom-may)
Age: 16-17
Birthdate: September 21
Blood Type: A
Gender: Male
Height: 189 CM
Loyalty: Yamagakure
Rank: Chunin
Weight: 53.5kg

_________________________________
Team
Unknown (Will be revealed after Kyousei leaves)
_________________________________
LIKES
Favorite foods: onigiri and tomatoes
Favorite colors: red green
Hobbies: None
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Dislikes
Fermented beans and anything sweet.
The colors pink, yellow and purple.
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Jutsu
(Unknown)
________________________________
Chakra natures
(unknown)
________________________________
notes: is secretly in-love with Yukida (Love tri-angle no?)


Part I


Chapter I
Introduction: Kyousei Ichibun!



I am Kyousei Ichibun. I belong to a clan, the Ichibun clan. the famed earth style clan. we are also famous for our eyes the Ichibun clan kekkei genkai, Tsuchigan. My eyes are special and I have a fire technique called Igni and it's very demonic. So well where do I start *sigh* when I was 7 I used to be a happy child always playing, but training just as hard. The rest of my clan saw and noticed how hard I was training and they thought I was good when I trained so they decided to test me. (Ihey thought I was going to be good enough to be the 2nd Yamakage of the Village*) *Village: the Village Hidden in the Mountains*

I was inside practicing my hand signs when my father called for me outside and he had shown me a jutsu, as he done the hand signs I watched and he then said ((Earth Style: Great Earth Wall!)) Before my eyes a giant wall of Earth sprouted out of the ground. No doubt this is one of the strongest Earth defense jutsu there was. Amazed and speechless my father started laughing and said "This will be nothing I'm sure you can do it with ease" Still speechless. He got on his knee and said "Son, I know you can do this." so I repeated the hand signs slowly, (I was practicing.) Then I started to do it fast then after 5 times I shouted ((Earth Style: Great Earth Wall!)) and needless to say (Not really needless). I failed, I was ashamed and embarrassed, I ran back to the house and ran in my room. (Did they expect a 7 year old to perfect the jutsu in one try? *Yep*) My father runs behind me and tells me no one gets it right the first time. After he told me that he left. Later that night I was outside practicing that jutsu, and failed a countless amount of times. I stayed up until I almost reduced my chakra to zip and fell out.
The next morning

My father had woke me up to tell me that I should try again, after all those failed attempts. "Hurry up and try it again i am sure you are going to perform it!" He said. So after I got up and dusted my self off I did handsigns and shouted ((Earth Style: Great Earth Wall!)) Then, something came out of the ground it was like the wall but only about 1 inch above of the ground. Another Failed Attempt :cry: So after that failed attempt the whole clan stopped believing I could be the Yamakage. My reputation fell off, and flew away, like a bird that was startled on the sidewalk. In the Ninja Academy I used to be the coolest, now I'm just a looser, and so under pressure and anger I went into a field and tried it again. Did the hand signs, and shouted ((Earth Style:Great Earth Wall!))... No doubt about it, a giant wall sprouted out of the ground and continued to grow. I was amazed! I had actually done it! I ran home as fast as I could then noticed I haven't smelled uncles noodles cooking when I got home. I searched for everyone and found them all around something, happily I ran up to the circle to tell them I had perfected the earth wall. I counted them and found two of them were missing, out of curiosity I ran closer to the crowd and looked. Right in the middle were my parents, laying on the ground, all chopped up and bleeding! Immediately I started crying and I forgot all about the amazing feat I had accomplished! Screaming and shouting out who did this, what happened, when and why?! No one seemed to know the answer but just that a skilled ninja came and attacked my parents on site, they said he took the whole clan on and of course he knew he wasn't going to win the battle so he finished his "mission" and escaped. *He was a ninja with a red star on his chest* I spent the next few days hid in the darkness, always alone in my old room.. barely eating anything, still thinking about my mothers cooking, thinking about how my father always saw potential in me. One day I was in the forest training when this ninja attacked me out of the blue, he was an assassin! He kicked me right in the face almost knocking me out, I thought *I don't need and guys making me mad today* I decided to fight back despite my age and my experience. I used a simple Earth technique ((Earth Style: Rock Waterfall!)) Once I said that pebbles and rocks showered him. While he was being pummeled I decided to pay him back and give him a kick straight in the face.*Poof* Shadow Clone! He was behind me with his kunai out ready to end my life when I turned and looked at him, and he was just simply encased in stone. Breathing heavily and amazed I just noticed I had activated my Tsuchimetsukigan!* (*A technique that can be used from Tsuchigan) :) After he was encased, my eyes started to bleed, *PAINFUL* and while looking at the rock case smoke started coming out of it. He was on fire in there! No doubt he was dead. I fell to the ground holding my eyes. It had felt like someone poked them with a hot kunai knife, and twisted it! My uncle from the clan saw this and said "Oh my god! A seven year old activated his Tsuchigan and then he used some fire technique that I didn't know our eyes were capable of!" Of course the clan rushed over as fast as they could to aid me, they rushed me to the med corps and they healed my eyes although I was temporarily blinded. After seven days or so I regained my eyesight back and was out exploring the Village again!!!

Chapter II
Kuro Kouen





Although I had gotten over my parents death a little, I still wasn't going to let the ninja responsible get away with what he has done, for a few days my clan noticed I am always in the shadows thinking I am mourning my parents death. but i am merely testing my skill. want to know how? i bring in some random harmless animal in my dark room and then use my Tsuchigan on them. my eyes don't bleed but i fried a few of those harmless little animals. and there is one thing i noticed about these eyes. they are dragging me into the darkness every time i use the igni of Tsuchigan (i am still the only one able to use igni). so after killing that last harmless little bird err animal i grabbed it threw it outside somewhere and headed for the ninja academy. all of a sudden no one talked to me or even decided to say hey. i know i had lost my cool but this? this is just weird! then i heard someone whisper 'kuro kouen' (meaning dark flame) so out of curiosity i stopped and turned around and asked "who said that?"(being a mean little 7 year old) Then someone said our parents told us not to speak to the kuro kouen! why does everyone want to come up with a way to really make me mad.

Two years after the kuro kouen nickname i had already graduated out of the ninja academy and progressed from genin, and chunin. My Teammates were 2 other kids who were 12-13 their names were uruyad (boy) and yukida (girl) and our sensei weritsa . so we were on a b rank mission to escort a demolitions guy who had a 30,000,000 ryou bounty on him (i thought this was going to be an a-ranked mission id hate to see what a super s-ranked mission is like) so slowly navigating him to his destination we were attacked by a group of heavily skilled ninja (jonin) quickly i reacted and used my Tsuchigan to quickly kill the first one, then used my sword, Setsuzentaru Tsurugi to kill the rest of them off, but what I didn't know is one had a camouflage ability and snuck behind us and grabbed the guy we were protecting (mission failed) (30,000,000 ryou lost from the village because of the failure of the mission) *slice* blood jumps all over us, our sensei didn't even see that one coming. i quickly charged and cut the guys head off, the end of him.

When we got home we explained the failure to the yamakage and my reputation slowly dropped once again. the next night i wake up and see the ninja who killed my father! The ninja with the red star! (its on now) Immediately i just up and quickly make a hand sign. he says "stop i only want to talk, for now" Not listening with rage built up in me i shouted earth style: flying boulder! (a boulder comes out of the ground and is controlled by the user) the ninja hops out my room and makes a hand sign then says earth style: great earth wall. amazed i thought how does he know that technique? and he sounds like someone i know. the boulder moving as fast as possible hits the wall and smashes into a million little pieces of dirt and rocks. so then i used some taijutsu skills on him . he is evading my every move like he knows whats going to happen, and finally a land a hit! Right in his left eye he jumps back and says earth style: collapsing earthquake! he had started a earthquake and i had lost my balance! when he saw this he attacked, kicking me in my gut then says "that's why i said we need to talk you are just a kid and you are trying to fight me" i said immediately "shut the h*ll up" (while coughing blood) after i stood up thinking I'm not going to go down without a real fight i shout this (a jutsu i had been training on) Water style: Hydro blast jutsu (failed) "i see no water here, sorry kid you failed" then i started on my taijutsu attacks again to keep the battle going, once again he is dodging all of my attacks then he comes with an uppercut, sends me flying several feet in the air. after that i am ready to give up but i shouted "WHY.WHY DID YOU KILL MY PARENTS!" just when he was about to say something he was interrupted by the rest of my clan using their jutsu on him. he had no other option but to flee (my clan was late to get to the battle) I passed out after that.



Chapter III
Kyousei Taichou





The next morning i woke up with a cold towel on my forehead. (reason: i had a pounding headache) My head was a little messed up so i couldn't remember anything from last-night.(like i had a hangover)So I took it off walked around, looked around and everywhere i looked was empty then i saw a note that read*私たちは、忍者の世話をするために行くの* (we are going to take care of that ninja) Immediately my memory hit me! and i remembered everything from last night. so i decided to train myself harder than i had before! so i went to a lake or a pond and shouted Water style: Hydro blast jutsu the water jumped from the pond and stroke a nearby tree, knocking it down. i thought to myself that was a pretty big tree, are my water powers that strong to knock that thing down? so later on my squad members and our sensei weritsu told me that the Yamakage has summoned us for a mission. after speaking with the Yamakage, me and my squad (team *weritsu*). the mission is a regular C ranked mission. our sensei will kind of hang back during this one. (our sensei left to finish another mission and made me captain)


The mission is to capture a rogue ninja and bring him back to yamagakure. so we are picking up clues going through a few towns and asking around. That's when two jonin from an unknown village (probably from the shadow village rofl. darkamaru sending his jonin to kill me >< *i think*) approach us. They thought we were just little kids. one of them said "you kids lost or something" I just looked at him then warned him to back off. they both laughed and one tried to pull out a kunai *** immediately i pulled out my sword setsuzentaru tsurugi and then faster than anyone would think those two guys heads and their bodies were in two different places! my teammates were amazed. so after that we continued our mission but it was getting late so we set up camp (in the middle of the forest) and shortly after that we were disturbed. by bugs... lol (What do you think they were going to get disturbed by?). The next morning we were off again looking for the rogue ninja, i had noticed something or SOMEONE was following us so i was extra cautious. sooner or later the mysterious person who was following us was ready to attack so i stopped. I alerted one of my teammate (uruyad) and said "up there, throw a kunai" he threw one *(crumble) a earth clone* The ninja had thought i was surprised. but i knew this was going to happen, and quickly i pulled out setsuzentaru tsurugi and i was ready to kill him as he snuck up behind us. then i cut him right across the face as he was about to make his strike! then when i looked at his chest.!



Chapter IV
Epic Battle: Kyousei vs The Ninja






So picking up from where me and my teammates left off i had surprised a ninja who tried to surprise us, you probably already guessed who the ninja was, yep that's right THE infamous ninja who killed my parents and keeps getting away from my clan alive (but didn't my clan say they were going to take care of him?) so after slicing him in his face he said "you are very smart, and always pick up on things in an instant. yukida and uruyad were ready to attack but i signaled them to stay back. then he said "are those two your friends? Ive seen what you can do now i want to see what THEY can do" he tried to attack them but i stopped his advance by blocking them off with a huge wall (earth style:great earth wall) then i pointed my sword at is face and said "this is between me and you!" he laughed and attacked, i dodged came back with an uppercut as fast as i could. this must have done some damage because he stumbled and left himself open so i punched him in the stomach and he broke into many pieces or crumbled dirt and rocks! AN EARTH CLONE turned around *POW* i was sent flying far backwards with blood flying out of my nose! i wiped my nose and said "that's all you got?" then i got up and charged at him and tried to punch him in the face and when he blocked it i grabbed my sword with my other hand and he jumped back i said "chikushou"




so after that he shouted summoning technique: earth release: devouring fang. he had summoned two vicious dogs that tried to eat me! so while i was occupied with those mutts he went to my teammates, so in a attempt to stop him i jumped over the dogs to run to him, i tried to kick him and *poof* another hard hit in my jaw but instead of letting me fly he did a combo he kicked me in my gut then he kicked me in the face and after i hit the ground picked me up and threw me in the sky and jumped, and kicked me hard to the ground, he said "it is futile to try and beat me, now give up!" of course after taken such a beating i said never but then i asked "my family/clan was supposed to take care of you so I'm sure if you escaped them again they have tracked you and will be here any moment!" then there was silence after that...



Then he finally said "i killed your clan" my eyes widened and i had gotten so angry the earth started to shake under my POWER (no i am not a jinchuuriki) my eyes changed, they were red and brown with the black dots around it! (brown = earth, red = fire, earth+fire = ?? LAVA/MAGMA) i was so angry i made magma come out of the ground! it flew at him burning everything in its way he dodged the lava but got burned on his face (like ow his face should be burned off lol) then i sprouted a whole volcano out of the ground and used that for support as i manipulated the lava and magma to attack him, luckily he isn't dead yet but i turned this whole forest (almost) into a smoldering battle field he had no choice but to turn around and escape, I'm sure that burn mark on his face will always let me know who he is.


Chapter V
Friendly Bondings

When I had returned to Yamagakure with my failed mission, I had always guessed that maybe the guy who killed my clan was the rouge ninja. However, when I spoke to the Yamakage, I was proven wrong. It seems the Yamakage has no knowledge of this ninja, so he decided to let me go with just a slap on the shoulder, that knocked me through a few walls. After tons of self-punishment, I finally got mentally strong enough to go back outside, and go on missions. We accomplished missions, did grueling work, and bonded, little by little.

Years Later
I had been assigned permanent sensei of Team Weritsu, and I have complete control over them. I am now 13, as my teammates are 16.

"Kyousei-kun, erm, Kyousei-sensei what's on your mind?" Yukida asked while twiddling her fingers. "You're such a weirdo Yukida!" Uruyad exclaimed while sitting atop a tree. "Atleast I have skills!" Yukida shouted back while sticking her tongue out. "Enough you two, it's nevewrecking to hear you argue and shout all day!" Kyousei yelled back, while meditating on the ground. "I-I'm sorry!" Yukida said while running away, to commence to hiding in an old hut. Kyousei sighs, and he just speeds off to another part of the forest. Uruyad then goes to talk with Yukida, but in a different manner and more politely. "You know he doesn't think you're totally annoying, right? He's just thinking about that guy from years back" Uruyad said while trying to console a crying Yukida. "Maybe, but he never acknowledges me, he never cares about me, he never wants to be around me." Said Yukida, while wiping her tears and running her hand through her long yellow hair. "I like to be around you." Uruyad said while realizing he just gave himself up. "What? I thought you hated me?" Yukida said, surprised. "Yeah, you're 16 years old and you're crying over a 13 year old jerk! Y-you should grow up! UGH!" Uruyad said, trying to get back into character and leaving the hut. "Wh-What?" Yukida said, puzzled.

Meanwhile, Uruyad and Yukida noticed a powerful chakra source coming from the area where Kyousei went, they went, curiously, to find Kyousei staring at something, looking troubled and full of hate.

Cyl
07-31-2009, 11:59 PM
Part I (Continued)
Chapter VI
The Ninja Revealed: Part 1


So Kyousei, on a mission of malevolence, was more determined than ever to kill the one who killed his clan. "What's the matter, Sensei?" asked Yukida. "Nothing, just a little focused on a certain someone." Kyousei stated. Kyousei, on guard, hears something. "Kyuosei, WATCH YOUR BACK!" Uruyad exclaimed! Five kunai were closing in on Kyousei, then Kyousei completely dodged them. "So, its you?" Kyousei said. "Long time no see, before I kill you, I will get rid of your annoying friends!" The ninja said. "No the hell you won't" Kyousei jumped in the air, did a few handsigns, and five hundred earth made kunai flew into a tree, the ninja jumped out the tree, trying to dodge the kunai, but kyousei, knew what he was doing! "DIE!" Kyousei exclaimed, and the kunai came from above and below! The ninja was inserted with over 500 kunai, but then crumbled away, it was an Earth clone!

"He's still around!" yelled Uruyad. "yeah, right behind you" the ninja said while kicking Uruyad into the air, then throwing a few shruiken into his back. "AAGH!" screamed Uruyad, while falling down and hitting the ground, paralyzed. Kyousei ordered Yukida to tend to Uruyad! "The ninja screamed ((Earth style: Branching Spike of Doom!)) A huge spike, erected from the ground and came charging at Kyousei with immense speed! Kyousei tries to dodge the spike a number of times, while the ninja is sitting there, watching. "Damn." Kyousei screamed as the spike went right past his head, "Almost got me." " Hahaha, why wont you die already?" the ninja said while another spike flew out of the ground! Another one? I cant spawn a defensive wall because the spikes are too fast, I have to think of something fast! Thought Kyousei. While Kyousei was occupied, the ninja walked towards Yukida and Uruyad, Yukida was aware of him! That's right! I can encase the spikes in stone! I hope this works! Kyousei thought as using his Tsuchi Metsukigan to encase the two dangerously fast and powerful spikes in hard, durable stone. "Hey, you bastard!" Yelled Kyousei while looking at the ninja! "I hope you like stone, NOW DIE" Yelled kyousei in a rage, stone was about to encase the ninja in stone, making it up his leg then broke into little pieces! What? what happened? Wondered Kyousei! "You havent figured it out yet? Kyousei, you can't use your Kekkei Genkai on me, because I can halt that, I can halt all of your efforts with those eyes, because i have the same eyes as you, I am apart of your clan, I am... Your father....."

Chapter VII
(The Ninja Revealed: Part 2)


"You're my father? That makes no sense! I saw my father dead and bleeding realistically on the ground!" Kyousei screamed in rage. "How dare you mock my father?!" "I never mocked him, me being dead was all a genjutsu cast by my eyes, you never even saw the real me." The man said. "What about mom? Also, what do you mean I never saw the real you?!" Kyousei asked, confused. "I killed her too, and you haven't" The man stated, while calmly pulling off his mask as the winds blew. Before the man could get his mask all the way off, revealing the cut and burn mark on his face, Yukida appears and punches him about 20 feet into the ground, also causing a giant shockwave that breaks up the ground, especially around where he hit. "I don't want to hear your bullcrap!" Yukida yelled in fury, while holding her fist.

"Fools." A voice which sounded like that man said. Soon after that, Kyousei gets a large gash across his shoulder, and blood shoots up as Kyousei is in a shocked state, and falls to the ground, passed out. "Didn't I tell you, you never seen the real me?!" After that, gashes on Yukida appears, and blood shoots out from them also, as she is easily incapacitated, probably killed. Kyousei still lays on the ground, with eyes wide open, and he suddenly starts to see, but all he see is the unmasked ninja, who is undoubtedly his father. He see's his father put away a katana, and disappear into sky, as everything turns black.


Part II.

Chapter VIII

Despair

It is dark, and I can't feel anything, my body weighs about 100 tons, and it feels like my lungs are barely getting air, and I can hardly breath. My eyes are snapped shut, but I am awoke. I open my eyes, a bit, and my eyes open a bit to a sleeping Yukida. She isn't dead, and that is a relief. She has long bandages over her stomach and her chest, as well as scars on her visible neck. I try to move my head in the opposite direction, but it feels like 50 tons are working against me, and it takes an eternity to reach my destination. Had I been this weak from just one slash? Once I see Uruyad laying safely also, I am kind of at peace, and I start to rest my eyes. I start to dream, to dream of the times me and my teammates bonded

Soon, the dream started turning into a nightmare, with blood being thrown all over the place, and my fathers face entering my head multiple times. His eyes, they're different, did I miss something in our fight? His eyes show layers of brown and red, 5 of them. His pupil of his eye was pitch black, and looked like a black hole. He continued to slash my teammate, as I sat and did nothing but lay motionless, without even being able to track his movements. I cried out to Yukida, or I at least tried, but, I was hopeless. I had lost all confidence, and all hope.

Once I awoke from my terrible nightmare, completely ignoring that Yukida and Uruyad weren't in their beds. I had felt the same way as I did in my nightmare, without confidence, with no hope. I had felt "despair." I got out of my soft bed, which I could feel now, but barely. I exhaustively dragged myself outside the hospital doors, completely ignoring the nurse that was yelling at me to remain in bed. It is stingily cold, and strong cold winds burn my skin in a way. Snow is blowing with this wind, it was obviously it was a blizzard out. I saw igloo like houses around, and people living in ice caps. Yukida and Uruyad appear next to me, and they try to pull me back to the bed, but I break free. "What Village are we in?" I said. "How nice, you couldn't even greet us." Uruyad said. I was happy to hear a familiar voice, and I smirked a bit. I looked up at the hospital, and saw a banner that read "Ice Village Hospital"

I look over to Yukida, who is completely alright, and I put my hands infront of my face. Why am I so weak? I was only hit once, wasn't I? Why am I in such a bad shape? Why is Yukida completely fine, I am both scarred and damaged mentally and physically. I fall to my knees under disappointment, despair, muscle failure, and the cold winds. "Kyousei-Sensei!" Yukida screamed as Uruyad carried me back into the hospital. After he has done that, a doctor walked up to me. "Hello, you should relax, you're not in the condition to be walking around, especially not outside since you're not totally prepared for our cold weather." The doctor told me. "Why? Why am I in such a bad condition?!" I yelled, faintly. "Well, doing our research on the girl, it was obvious she was cut with a katana, but on our research on you, it was a completely different type of sword. We have no idea why, but when you came here, your muscles were seized up, and you had lost a larger amount of blood than the girl, even though she had more gashes and cuts. You only had one." Kyousei stared confusingly at the doctor. "Wha, wha?" "Well, your muscles were seized up, they got tight, it was like Tetanus or something. We found some toxin throughout your body, and it was unlike anything we have ever seen before, one drop of it was enough kill a full-grown bull. You however, survived 5 tablespoons worth of it, you're lucky to be alive."

I am in shock, but I doesn't worry about this as I wonder why I am in the Ice Village, one of the Mountains secret allies. "Why am I not in my Villages hospital?" I asked. There was a long moment of silence, and that's when Uruyad said something. "The Village was destroyed."




Chapter IX
Hopeless

I didn't say anything, but the evidence was in my face, in my eyes, that I had been surprised to the point it seemed I was about to just pass out and die from extreme shock. "I..I don't believe it" I stuttered while stumbling backwards. "It's true, and, almost everyone died, the Yamakage had saved some of the villagers. However, it had cost him his life doing it." The doctor had said while grabbing my shoulder. "So the old geezer is gone?" I said. "Yes, he's gone Kyousei." Once this is said, my head falls, as tears drop to the ground. I then start to whimper a few words. "Who, who did this?" I asked. There was another long pause. After a few minutes of silence, Yukida finally spoken up and said, "Your father." My head shot up instantly, with tears flying off of my face. "MY...My father!" I was enraged, I then started to run, without feeling any sense of weakness, and I go outside into the blistering cold. "Where are you going?! KYOUSEI-SENSEI?!" Yukida yelled out. Kyousei stopped, closed his eyes, and turned around and said while opening his eyes. "To kill..That man" Kyousei said, revealing a new pattern of Tsuchigan.

Chapter X
Retribution

Yukida stared motionless into my eyes, the eyes which held no visible pupil. The eyes which were crimson red, and had flames that burned for eternity in each eye. The flame would be considered the pupils of my eyes, I guess, since they are placed where my pupils should be. The doctor stood, truly terrified, as well as Uruyad. Yukida, however, wasn't afraid, but she was obviously sad, and her eyes started to get watery. I don't feel cold anymore, for some reason, it was getting warmer since I opened my eyes, but now, it's completely warm. I disappear into the blizzard as Yukida starts to cry.

I ran, through the blinding blizzard, and never faltered. The snow that hit me, instantly melted, and the water left over from the snow, soaked my clothes, but they dried quickly. I didn't have weather fitting clothes, however. I have regular black sandals, black jogging pants, a black t-shirt, and a headband on my forehead which had the Mountain Villages symbol on it.

After days and nights of traversing through the Land of Snow with no resting, and no sleeping, I entered the Land of Soil. The fire inside me kept me woke, and warm, the fire burned with a desire, a desire to kill the man I once called my father. From this point on, I walked, I know where my old village is naturally, and I work towards that direct. After a few hours of walking, I entire a land that is covered totally in dust. I then notice 5 chakra signatures, and I stop. "Show yourselves, you traitors." Once I say this, 5 men appear from dust blowing in the wind infront of me. "Dust Village Hokori clan huh? I thought all of you would have been killed in the annihilation of the Village Hidden in the Dust."

The scene changes to two men walking in the Land of Soil, wearing black Japanese robes, and black Hakama, and straw roped sandals. One of the men are wearing a Haori, or a white kimono jacket that stretches down to his hip. At the ends of it, a symbol is placed there. "Φ"
On the back of this gentlemen, there is a triangle, with a Japanese number that reads "8" on it. "Hey, Captain, when are we going to get to this Village?" The tall, slim man, with straight, long, blonde hair that runs halfway down his back asked. He always had this mean look on his face, but almost always smirked out of pleasure for some reason. The other one, with the Haori, who is taller than the other man, and has a more calm face than the other one, but he wasn't as slim as him, and had a bald head began to answer. "We'll be there soon, it's not like we have anything to lose, we are Soul Reapers you know."



Chapter XI
Secret Rogue.



"Yeah, you're right." The shorter man answered. "I hate that we have to kill that guy!" "We were assigned this mission because we are the best suited for it, we are the ones who handle new Soul Reapers that go rogue." The bald man jokingly said. "You should be used to it, Gouzen." Gouzen looked at his captain, and smirked as he said this. "Right, Captain Derekku, these missions are painful."

I stand before the 5 Hokori clan members, and wait for them to make a move. Not too long after I talked about to annihilation of the Dust Village, one performs hand signs, and claps his hands together and whispers ((Dust Style: Whirling Dust Storm!)) I then notice dust is being blown around, and it a storm ensues. The dust flying through the air with such power threatens to knock me into the air if I lose my footing, and my sight is reduced greatly. One of the men disappear I then feel a pain in my back, and blood drips down from a long slash on my back. "What the hell?!" I then flip back, and I lose sight of the other men completely. More cuts appear all around me, and then, flame appears on the edges of these cuts, but I don't feel pain. The cuts then close, and I stop bleeding. I jump back, withstanding the winds, and I hear something. More cuts appear on my body, even though I haven't seen those guys yet. The fire continuously heals me, and once again, I hear something that I can't make out, and cuts appear on my body again. "What the hell is going on here?!"

Yukida eyes pour out tears, as she continues to scream for her sensei's name. She gets no answer, but cold winds entering through the open door of the hospital. The doctor still stands in shock, and Uruyad gets a grip on reality. Uruyad runs to Yukida and holds her, and whispers. "Everything's going to be alright." Yukida cries in Uruyads arms, and the doctor walks over to the door, and closes it. Meanwhile, a man walks in through the door the doctor just closed, with a Mountain headband, a light skinned face, a jonin jacket, jogging pants, and black sandals. Under the jacket shows a white shirt, that looks as if it were fresh out of the dryer, and Uruyad and Yukida stare at him. "Weritsa-sensei?"

"I didn't come this far to get killed by you traitorous assholes!" I scream out as I hear this whisper something again. This time, I can make ito ut, and I notice the man says ((Secret Hokori Clan Technique: Silent Dust Slash!)) and my eyes get wide. I then smile, and I see a oddly shaped figure in the dust, but it is the same color. "I can see him" I thought. The man slowly comes at me, that means I must mean I can bullet time him, and I raise my blade, Setsuzentaru Tsurugi, and blocks the oncoming slash with ease. The mans face becomes visible when I block his attack, and his eyes widen, and he has this very surprised look on his face. Then, he is lit aflame completely, and before he can scream in agony, he is incinerated, and "dust" turns to "ash." The other 4 are coming at me as well, and my sword sets ablaze and I spin quickly, and a fire tornado engulfs them all, setting them on fire as this devilish look is created on my face. I stand in the middle of 5 piles of ash, and I say "I will, kill my father."

The scene changed back to the two men, still walking towards the village. Derekku then says "Yeah, but this time, we're killing a peculiar person, a person who contains a mix of the energies, Warui Ichibun"

Minoru
08-01-2009, 12:01 AM
Sorry I would read it but i dont have the kind of attention span to read all of that at once

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 12:08 AM
(Im new to this so if you dont like it or cant understand sorry)
(also various people are not said and names not mentioned, to lazy to come up with them)

I am cyl. nothing else. but there was a time when i was a kid with a real nameand i belonged to a clan, the borakus clan. the famed earth style clan. we are also famous for are eyes the bora clan kekkei genkai, borastone, and another i only have. My eyes are special and i have a fire technique called igni and its very demonic :) .So well where do i start *sigh* when i was 7 i used to be a happy child always playing but learning just as hard. the rest of my clan saw and noticed how hard i was learning and they thought i was good when i trained so they decided to test me. (they thought i was gunna be good enough to be the kage of the village) *village: unknown*

I was inside practicing my hand signs when my father called for me outside and he showed me a jutsu, as he done the hand signs i watched and he then said earth style: great earth wall!. and before my eyes a giant wall of earth sprouted out of the ground. No doubt this is one of the strongest earth defenses jutsu's there was. Amazed and speechless my father started laughing and said "this will be nothing im sure you can do it with ease" Still speechless. He got on his knee and said "son, i know you can do this" so i reapeated the hand times slowly ( i was practicing) then i started to do it fast then after 5 times i shouted earth style: great earth wall! needless to say (not realy needless). I failed, I was ashamed and embarrased, I ran back to the house and ran in my room. (did they expect a 7 year old to perfect the jutsu in one try?*yep*) My father runs behind me and tells me noone gets it right the first time. Finnaly after he told me that he left. Later that night i was outside practicing that jutsu. Countless failed attempts. I stayed up untill i almost reduced my chakra to 0 and fell out. The next mourning

My father had woke me up to tell me that i should try again, after all those failed attempts. "hurry up and try it again i am sure you are going to perfect it"" SSo after i got up and dusted my self off i shouted Earth style: great earth wall! Then, something came out of the ground it was like the wall but i inch out of the ground. Another Failed Attempt:cry: So after that failed attempt the whole clan stopped believing i could be the kage. My reputation fell off, and flew away. in the academy i used to be the coolest now i am just a looser so under pressure and anger i went into a field and tried it again. Did the hand signs. AND SHOUTED! earth style:GREAT EARTH WALL... No doubt about it, A big wall sprouted out of the ground and continued to grow. I WAS AMAZED! I HAVE ACTUALLY DONE IT! I ran home aas fast as i could then noticed i havent smelled uncles noodles cooking when i got home. I searched for everyone and found them all around something, happily i ran up to the circle to tell them I had perfected the earth wall. I counted them and found two of them were missing, out of curiousty i ran closer to the crowd and looked. Right in the middle were my parents! (oh no) Immediatly i started crying and i forgot all about the amazing feat i had accomplished! Screaming and shouting who did this, what happened, when and why! Noone seemed to know the answer but just that a good ninja came and attacked my parents on site, they said he took the whole clan on and of course he knew he wasnt going to win the battle so he finished his mission and escaped. ( 1st mission: my parents 2nd mission my whole clan) I spent the next few days hid in the darkness, always alone in my old room.. barely eating anything, still thinking about my mothers cooking, thinking about how my father always saw potential in me. One day i was in the forest training when this ninja attacked me out of the blue. kicked me right in the face almost knocking me out, i thought *I dont need and guys making me mad today* so i decided to fight back despite my age and my expirence. So i used a simple earth technique earth style: rock waterfall showered him with pebbles and rocks and while he was being pummled i made my attack and kicked him right in the face like he did me earlier *poof* shadow clone! he was behind me with his kunai out ready toend my life when i looked at him and he was just simply encased in stone . Breathing very hard and amazed i just noticed i just activated my borakus eyes :). so after he was encased my eyes started to bleed *PAINFUL* and while looking at the rock case smoke started coming out of it he was on fire IN THERE! no doubt he was dead. I fell to the ground holding my eyes. it had felt like someone poked them with a hot kunai knife! My uncle from the clan saw this and said "OMG. a seven year old activated his borakus eyes!, and then he used some fire technique that i didnt know our eyes were capable of!" Of course the clan rushed over as fast as they could to aid me, they rushed me to the med corps and they healed my eyes although i was temporarly blinded. After seven days or so i regained my eyesight back and was out exploring the village again!!!
To be continued!! ( i will add more to this soon and please, if you didnt like it dont comment at all. and i am open for ideas on what to add to cyls story when i start adding more. the name kuro kouen (litarlly meaning 'dark flame') will be also used in the next part of the story , (ty for reading )
nice job.

Cyl
08-01-2009, 12:24 AM
thank you

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 12:48 AM
you inspired me to write my own fanfic too.I've actually been meaning to for a while though...

Cyl
08-01-2009, 12:55 AM
:D cool illl be sure to read it

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 12:59 AM
its got a long title."the young boy who lived in the shadow of greatness shall cast the shadow"

Cyl
08-01-2009, 01:06 AM
its got a long title."the young boy who lived in the shadow of greatness shall cast the shadow"
man... thats a long title. makes me wanna read it even more

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 01:06 AM
lol.long story too...

Cyl
08-01-2009, 01:24 AM
figures =/ lol o yea and tommorow i will be working on my story (unknown time )

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 01:26 AM
cool.cant wait.n_n

Cyl
08-01-2009, 01:33 AM
it will be four times longer than it is right now... lol im making a book (jk) or am i?

Cyl
08-01-2009, 01:34 AM
hey have u clicked the spoiler thing in my signature yet?

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 01:39 AM
yep, the world is playin limbo.see i click spoilers to get first impressions.n_n

Cyl
08-01-2009, 01:36 PM
ive added more to the story . read it people . lol

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 01:53 PM
and read chapta 2 and vote on chapta three.

Cyl
08-01-2009, 02:54 PM
someone tell me how to make my story more 'intresting'

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 03:12 PM
add some plot twists or do a viewer selected chapter.thats what im doing...

Cyl
08-01-2009, 04:39 PM
k. the twist i have FOR YOU GUYS is gunna be big exiciting AND VERY VERY VERY LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG oes to sleep) anywho thats long isnt it? looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooooooonger plz

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 04:42 PM
thats so looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong. did you vote on my third chappie yet?

Cyl
08-01-2009, 04:53 PM
not yet but i will right now. and i am updating my story on another browser lol

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 04:54 PM
cool...wat do you not yet but right now.......?

Cyl
08-01-2009, 05:07 PM
cool...wat do you not yet but right now.......?
??????????????????

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 05:24 PM
never mind...........................

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 05:27 PM
PART 3

The next mourning i woke up with a cold towel on my forehead. (reason: i had a pounding headache) My head was a little messed up so i couldnt remember anything from lastnight.(like i had a hangover)So I took it off walked around, looked around and everywhere i looked was empty then i saw a note that read*私たちは、忍者の世話をするために行くの* (we are going to take care of that ninja) Immediatly my memory hit me! and i remembered everything from last night. so i decided to train myself harder than i had before! so i went to a lake or a pond and shouted Water style: Hydro blast jutsu the water jumped from the pond and stirked a nearby tree, knocking it down. i thought to myself that was a pretty big tree, are my water powers that strong to knock that thing down? so later on my squad members (unknown unknown and unknown) told me that the Yamakage has summoned us for a mission. after speaking with the Yamakage, me and my sqaud (team *cyl*). the mission is a regular C ranked mission so i iwll kinda hangg back and see what my squadmates got.

The mission is to capture a rogue ninja and bring him back to yamakagure. so we are walking picking up clues going through a few towns and ask around. Thats when two jounin from an unknown (probably from the shadow village rofl. darkamaru sending his jounins to kill me >< *i think*) village approach us. They thought we were just little kids. one of them said "you kids lost or something" I just looked at him then warned him to back off. they both laughed and one tried to pull out a kunai *** immediatly i pulled out my sword setsuzentaru tsurugi and then faster than anyone would think those two guys heads and their bodys were in two different places! my students were amazed . so after that we continued our mission but it was getting late so we set up camp (in the middle of the forest) and shortly after that we were disturbed. by bugs... lol (What do you think they were gunna get disturbed by?). The next mourning we were off again looking for the rogue ninja, i had noticed something or SOMEONE was following us so i was extra cautious. sooner or later the mysterious person who was following us was ready to attack so i stooped my squad and said "up their, throw a kunai" he threw one *poof a shadow clone* he thought i was surprised. but i knew this was gunna happen quickly i pulled out setsuzentaru tsurugi and i was ready to kill him as he snuck up behind us. then i cut him right accross the face as he was about to make his strike! then when i looked at his chest. omg im to lazy to type PART 4 NEXT i saw the nina with the red star again. lol *its on*

i feel honored to be mentioned and yes i am the kage of shadow.but why did you kill weriku and yitoma?

Cyl
08-01-2009, 05:42 PM
i feel honored to be mentioned and yes i am the kage of shadow.but why did you kill weriku and yitoma?
one tried to pull out a kunai. or a scroll or a letter from you idk

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 05:44 PM
one tried to pull out a kunai. or a scroll or a letter from you idk haha
T_T they were bringing me some candy.....

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 05:44 PM
oh and my newest chap is out.it only took me five minutes!

Cyl
08-01-2009, 05:50 PM
mine took 30 mins -.-

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 05:52 PM
daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang........

Cyl
08-01-2009, 05:55 PM
yes :( hey . i hope you win that fanfic contest but the guy who has been doing his story for 1/2 years has a very good chance!!!!!!

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 06:01 PM
dang.well im not done yet so i might.im aiming for 13 chapters.

Cyl
08-01-2009, 06:04 PM
alot of chapters man, im aiming for either multiplying my story by 4 times or 100 or so Parts i might call them chapters after i finish it

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 06:05 PM
crap...nice......

Cyl
08-01-2009, 07:14 PM
hey i need new ideas for some names!

Cyl
08-01-2009, 07:15 PM
like my squad member names and my parents names

Cyl
08-01-2009, 07:15 PM
and a name for my character "cyl" is just soo boring

darkamaru
08-01-2009, 07:26 PM
hey i need new ideas for some names!
teammate1-uruyad
teammate2-yukida
sensei-weritsa
mom-reidou
dad-otokuya

Cyl
08-01-2009, 07:44 PM
also the 1st yamakage 2nd yamakage ( 1st and 2nd mountain shadows) names please

Cyl
08-01-2009, 11:07 PM
yooohoooo? anyone there

Cyl
08-01-2009, 11:07 PM
*sleepy*

darkamaru
08-02-2009, 09:29 AM
also the 1st yamakage 2nd yamakage ( 1st and 2nd mountain shadows) names please
well, you could just keep them as "1st yamakage" and "2nd yamakage" but if you want,this is what i use
http://www.freedict.com/onldict/jap.html
hope it helps

Cyl
08-02-2009, 02:19 PM
i know i use that too :-D because thats where i got yamakage from. well the yama part

Cyl
08-02-2009, 06:40 PM
someone pm me for ideas on MY STORY plz

Cyl
08-02-2009, 06:41 PM
and i hate how the off topic posts dont count

darkamaru
08-02-2009, 06:52 PM
me too, i lost like 300 or 400 posts...

Cyl
08-02-2009, 07:16 PM
wow rly?

darkamaru
08-02-2009, 07:24 PM
really.

Cyl
08-02-2009, 07:26 PM
thats alot of lost posts :(

Cyl
08-02-2009, 07:28 PM
bored

Cyl
08-02-2009, 08:33 PM
yoo hoo? anyone there!??!

Cyl
08-03-2009, 07:34 AM
i hate when it gets "dead" like this :( soo lonely *tumbleweed* what the! (,;',/')*empty*

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 07:37 AM
*gets hit by tumbleweed and rolls away*AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!AA AAAHHHHHHH!WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Cyl
08-03-2009, 07:39 AM
*gets hit by tumbleweed and rolls away*AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!AA AAAHHHHHHH!WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
o.O really? *where are u going come back?*"lol you ok??" youare like AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HELP then wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee then AHHH SOMEBODY HELP then wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 07:44 AM
o.o really? *where are u going come back?*"lol you ok??" youare like ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh help then wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee then ahhh somebody help then wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhwheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeahhhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!!

Cyl
08-03-2009, 08:35 AM
lol lolololol

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 08:53 AM
(-(-(-(-(-(-(-(-(-(-(-(-.-)-)-)-)-)-)-)-)-)-)-)-) VS (>(>(>(>.<)<)<)<)

who will win?
$_$ wins.

Cyl
08-03-2009, 08:58 AM
my regular army will stare the elite to DEATH! and lol at the $_$

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 09:37 AM
my regular army will stare the elite to DEATH! and lol at the $_$
$_$ kaching!my smiley is now copyright.you owe me fiiiiiiive dollars.
me:shut up kakuzu!
kakuzu:DONT MAKE YOUR LAWYER SHUT UP!!!OR ILL QUIT!

Cyl
08-03-2009, 09:39 AM
$_$ kaching!my smiley is now copyright.you owe me fiiiiiiive dollars.
me:shut up kakuzu!
kakuzu:DONT MAKE YOUR LAWYER SHUT UP!!!OR ILL QUIT!

LOLOLOLOLOl>?????

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 09:48 AM
i love internet smileys....

Cyl
08-03-2009, 09:49 AM
T_T (^<^) (^>^) (^_^) xD :-P (^.>) (<.^) and many many many many more

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 09:53 AM
my own original smiley that i invented- ~_n n_~ ~_~

Cyl
08-03-2009, 09:56 AM
cool heres mine (^>^) (^<^) (^.<) (^.>) and my fav! <<^.^>> narutos whiskers
:-D

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 10:00 AM
@/_\@:hey kisame?
=o_o=:yes itachi?
@/_\@:go away.n_n
=p_q=:*sniffle*okay

Cyl
08-03-2009, 10:05 AM
@/_\@:hey kisame?
=o_o=:yes itachi?
@/_\@:go away.n_n
=p_q=:*sniffle*okay
what the?, lol niiiiiiice (kisame crys?)

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 10:11 AM
what the?, lol niiiiiiice (kisame crys?)
when a certain uchiha is being a big meanie pants!

Cyl
08-03-2009, 10:25 AM
lol o.o

Cyl
08-03-2009, 11:05 AM
everyone loves to leave :( *lonely*

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 11:10 AM
no i was just typing out "dearly departed" my latest chapter.

Cyl
08-03-2009, 11:12 AM
coolz now i gotta read it

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 11:17 AM
i guess so.n_n.the next one will come out tommorow,at most.

Cyl
08-03-2009, 11:25 AM
D: D:

darkamaru
08-03-2009, 11:26 AM
maybe later today.probably after supper.........

Cyl
08-04-2009, 03:08 PM
hm did you edit your story yet?

darkamaru
08-04-2009, 03:10 PM
i think so....wait!no.....i did not....but i will!

Cyl
08-04-2009, 03:14 PM
! Hurry

darkamaru
08-04-2009, 03:31 PM
kay kay kay!!!!!!don't rush the artis`!did you edit yours?

Cyl
08-04-2009, 03:34 PM
yep i changed my kekkei genkai name and some other stuff YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO READ IT ALL OVER AGAIN lol

darkamaru
08-04-2009, 03:37 PM
yep i changed my kekkei genkai name and some other stuff YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO READ IT ALL OVER AGAIN lol
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEZ!!!!!!!!!!!lol jk.i will.

Cyl
08-04-2009, 03:41 PM
:D yay

Cyl
08-04-2009, 06:15 PM
look at the very end of my signature

darkamaru
08-04-2009, 06:16 PM
awesome chapter!i wonder who that guy really is...

Cyl
08-04-2009, 06:18 PM
>.> ya, that um, ya im not telling anyone untill the next part ya no umm. and ty for the compliment

darkamaru
08-04-2009, 06:19 PM
my next one will be tommorow.

Cyl
08-04-2009, 06:22 PM
my next one might be at 2:00 am before i go tosleep lol but i want to make them WAIT they cant even compliment on my story lol jk jk

darkamaru
08-04-2009, 06:25 PM
lol.....

Cyl
08-04-2009, 06:28 PM
maybe instead of calling them parts i should call them arcs then parts or chapters?

darkamaru
08-05-2009, 04:57 PM
...i do call them chapters....

Cyl
08-05-2009, 04:59 PM
maybe i should start working on my story, add the next part/chapter or w/e

darkamaru
08-05-2009, 05:00 PM
yea me too.i totally forgot...

Cyl
08-05-2009, 05:24 PM
OK NOWZ IM GUNNA START WOOT this time the ninja will be revieled i think!

darkamaru
08-05-2009, 05:25 PM
is it someone i would know?*hoping it could be someone from my story.XD*

Cyl
08-05-2009, 05:36 PM
no no spoilers for you!!

Cyl
08-05-2009, 05:37 PM
and just to point that out we already did someone from your story or village, didnt go to well lol!

darkamaru
08-05-2009, 05:41 PM
oh yea,you killed them during their adventure to the land of chocolates.T_T

Cyl
08-05-2009, 05:46 PM
lol, sorry, but what were they pulling out?

darkamaru
08-05-2009, 06:09 PM
oh they were pulling out a white flag tied to a kunai.it was a sign of peace...lol

Cyl
08-05-2009, 06:12 PM
something is stopping me from making part 5 or chapter 5!. im like easily distracted

Cyl
08-05-2009, 06:12 PM
oh they were pulling out a white flag tied to a kunai.it was a sign of peace...lol
..... oops

Cyl
08-05-2009, 06:48 PM
welll i gots to go i couldnt finish in time cyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Cyl
08-12-2009, 12:41 AM
im starting on part 5

darkamaru
08-12-2009, 08:17 AM
yay!and when i get to it i'll start on the newest chapter,"all will be revealed"

Cyl
08-12-2009, 11:44 AM
yay, btw im not finished with part 5. LOL. i think this one will be longer than part 1 idk

darkamaru
08-12-2009, 11:47 AM
dang...

Cyl
08-16-2009, 06:29 PM
dark u will have to read my story ALL OVER again once i change my clans name (rofl jk you dont have to read it over again)

Cyl
08-23-2009, 07:54 PM
someone read this and tell me if its good or bad D: im lonely here!

darkamaru
08-24-2009, 07:08 AM
im here buddeh!!

Cyl
08-24-2009, 11:34 AM
yay!!!!!!!

darkamaru
08-24-2009, 11:39 AM
yay!!!!!!

Cyl
08-24-2009, 11:46 AM
well i have to go but ill be back

loved the new chap btw

darkamaru
08-24-2009, 11:50 AM
thanks dude.^^

(un)Godly Hiroku
08-24-2009, 12:03 PM
wow this is pretty cool
i read the first part
but it doesnt seem like a good trade off
using the eye technique and then being blinded for a week after lol
well anyways it was pretty good
some spelling mistakes
and your uncle didnt rlly talk like a character from naruto
but i got the point lol
but i think u should change ur occuluar eye name
becuz all the occuluar eyes end with gan
sharinGAN
rinneGAN
byakuGAN

Cyl
08-25-2009, 02:57 AM
wow this is pretty cool
i read the first part
but it doesnt seem like a good trade off
using the eye technique and then being blinded for a week after lol
well anyways it was pretty good
some spelling mistakes
and your uncle didnt rlly talk like a character from naruto
but i got the point lol
but i think u should change ur occuluar eye name
becuz all the occuluar eyes end with gan
sharinGAN
rinneGAN
byakuGAN yes i know about the spelling mistake's i just havent had the time to look for them and correct them

and the eye technique

i havent thought if i should change the name yet

well since i was still young and just activating the technique (a higher level of it) it saved my life but at a heavy price, you get it?

darkamaru
08-26-2009, 01:11 PM
part six prease?

Uchiha master
08-26-2009, 01:38 PM
I like your story it's awsome

Cyl
10-25-2009, 01:13 PM
maybe i should finish this story?

(1000th post! WOOHOO)

I like your story it's awsome

thx, now all i have to do is make another chapter *Sigh*

Cyl
10-29-2009, 05:14 PM
Revive

darkamaru
10-29-2009, 05:27 PM
nice new part(new to me at least)...poor doggy...

Cyl
11-29-2009, 03:38 PM
I'll never finish this D: :cry:

darkamaru
11-29-2009, 03:45 PM
YES YOU WILL!!!all it takes is faith,trust,and PIXIE STIX!!!!!!!

Cyl
11-29-2009, 03:56 PM
YES YOU WILL!!!all it takes is faith,trust,and PIXIE STIX!!!!!!!

LOL, pixie stix..

sakuracha!!!
11-29-2009, 04:00 PM
cool it ws awsome

Cyl
11-29-2009, 04:07 PM
Thanks sakuracha

Cyl
11-29-2009, 04:29 PM
Im finished with chapter 6 (for gods sake)

and i have like two chapters left before im done with arc 1... :D what a looong arc..

darkamaru
11-29-2009, 04:32 PM
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AY!!!!!!!1and the chapter im writing STILL doesn't reveal the identity of the person who sent the letter...

Cyl
12-10-2009, 05:55 PM
Im going to make the next chapter and it might be the last chapter for this arc

or maybe the next after the new one, either wya the ninja will be revealed.

and i will start making em every day i thinkk lol

darkamaru
12-11-2009, 01:48 PM
yay!!

Cyl
12-11-2009, 05:22 PM
Ok now i gotta make two chapters today :roll:

Cyl
12-11-2009, 07:29 PM
Chapter VI

So Kyousei, on a mission of malevolence, was more determined than ever to kill the one who killed his clan. "What's the matter, Sensei?" asked Yukida. "Nothing, just a little focused on a certain someone." Kyousei stated. Kyousei, on guard, hears something. "Kyuosei, WATCH YOUR BACK!" Uruyad exclaimed! Five kunai were closing in on Kyousei, then Kyousei completely dodged them. "So, its you?" Kyousei said. "Long time no see, before I kill you, I will get rid of your annoying friends!" The ninja said. "No the hell you won't" Kyousei jumped in the air, did a few handsigns, and five hundred earth made kunai flew into a tree, the ninja jumped out the tree, trying to dodge the kunai, but kyousei, knew what he was doing! "DIE!" Kyousei exclaimed, and the kunai came from above and below! The ninja was inserted with over 500 kunai, but then crumbled away, it was an Earth clone!

"He's still around!" yelled Uruyad. "yeah, right behind you" the ninja said while kicking Uruyad into the air, then throwing a few shruiken into his back. "AAGH!" screamed Uruyad, while falling down and hitting the ground, paralyzed. Kyousei ordered Yukida to tend to Uruyad! "The ninja screamed ((Earth style: Branching Spike of Doom!)) A huge spike, erected from the ground and came charging at Kyousei with immense speed! Kyousei tries to dodge the spike a number of times, while the ninja is sitting there, watching. "Damn." Kyousei screamed as the spike went right past his head, "Almost got me." " Hahaha, why wont you die already?" the ninja said while another spike flew out of the ground! Another one? I cant spawn a defensive wall because the spikes are too fast, I have to think of something fast! Thought Kyousei. While Kyousei was occupied, the ninja walked towards Yukida and Uruyad, Yukida was aware of him! That's right! I can encase the spikes in stone! I hope this works! Kyousei thought as using his Tsuchi Metsukigan to encase the two dangerously fast and powerful spikes in hard, durable stone. "Hey, you bastard!" Yelled Kyousei while looking at the ninja! "I hope you like stone, NOW DIE" Yelled kyousei in a rage, stone was about to encase the ninja in stone, making it up his leg then broke into little pieces! What? what happened? Wondered Kyousei! "You havent figured it out yet? Kyousei, you can't use your Kekkei Genkai on me, because I can halt that, I can halt all of your efforts with those eyes, because i have the same eyes as you, I am apart of your clan, I am... Your father....."

darkamaru
12-11-2009, 07:39 PM
ZOMG THAT WAS PWNROCKIN!!!nice chapter...

Cyl
12-11-2009, 07:42 PM
Thanks, now i await your new chapter 8D

Ur Mom
12-12-2009, 06:39 AM
TOO MUCH, NOT ENOUGH ATTENTION SPAN! *brain explodes* (it's was still good through the 5th chapter, I don't have the attention span to go any longer)

darkamaru
12-12-2009, 07:30 AM
Thanks, now i await your new chapter 8D
can you post there first?i'm too lazy to dig through my subscribed threads so i need it on the front page for me to click on it...lolz

kakashi 4
01-03-2010, 04:14 PM
I have hte attention span of a squirrel

shinedown1
01-04-2010, 06:15 PM
It's really good so far! ^^ I can't wait for more! :D

Cyl
01-04-2010, 06:21 PM
Cool thanks, but untill the weekend I won't be adding the next chapter.

shinedown1
01-05-2010, 01:14 PM
Cool thanks, but untill the weekend I won't be adding the next chapter.Rawwwr!!!!!! Me want more now! >.< (JK)

Kassie
01-11-2010, 09:59 PM
Really like it :). I love to read so I did read it all and its great, nice job :D.

Cyl
05-24-2010, 11:18 PM
/bump
I'm re-starting this.
The forums destroyed a whole chapter, so I had to make Chapter 5 fit with chapter 7, I just changed 7 to 6, and revised chapter 5 completely.

This set me back, big time. D;. I was planning on making atleast 3 new chapters before leaving.

Taker369
05-24-2010, 11:20 PM
that sucks i want more.http://s236.photobucket.com/albums/ff286/nfforums/NF%20smilies/sun.png

Cyl
05-24-2010, 11:21 PM
that sucks i want more.http://s236.photobucket.com/albums/ff286/nfforums/NF%20smilies/sun.png
You like my fanfic? xD
Never knew.
I'll give you guys more tomorrow, most definitely.
Later Taker.

Cyl
05-25-2010, 02:29 PM
Chapter VI

So Kyousei, on a mission of malevolence, was more determined than ever to kill the one who killed his clan. "What's the matter, Sensei?" asked Yukida. "Nothing, just a little focused on a certain someone." Kyousei stated. Kyousei, on guard, hears something. "Kyuosei, WATCH YOUR BACK!" Uruyad exclaimed! Five kunai were closing in on Kyousei, then Kyousei completely dodged them. "So, its you?" Kyousei said. "Long time no see, before I kill you, I will get rid of your annoying friends!" The ninja said. "No the hell you won't" Kyousei jumped in the air, did a few handsigns, and five hundred earth made kunai flew into a tree, the ninja jumped out the tree, trying to dodge the kunai, but kyousei, knew what he was doing! "DIE!" Kyousei exclaimed, and the kunai came from above and below! The ninja was inserted with over 500 kunai, but then crumbled away, it was an Earth clone!

"He's still around!" yelled Uruyad. "yeah, right behind you" the ninja said while kicking Uruyad into the air, then throwing a few shruiken into his back. "AAGH!" screamed Uruyad, while falling down and hitting the ground, paralyzed. Kyousei ordered Yukida to tend to Uruyad! "The ninja screamed ((Earth style: Branching Spike of Doom!)) A huge spike, erected from the ground and came charging at Kyousei with immense speed! Kyousei tries to dodge the spike a number of times, while the ninja is sitting there, watching. "Damn." Kyousei screamed as the spike went right past his head, "Almost got me." " Hahaha, why wont you die already?" the ninja said while another spike flew out of the ground! Another one? I cant spawn a defensive wall because the spikes are too fast, I have to think of something fast! Thought Kyousei. While Kyousei was occupied, the ninja walked towards Yukida and Uruyad, Yukida was aware of him! That's right! I can encase the spikes in stone! I hope this works! Kyousei thought as using his Tsuchi Metsukigan to encase the two dangerously fast and powerful spikes in hard, durable stone. "Hey, you bastard!" Yelled Kyousei while looking at the ninja! "I hope you like stone, NOW DIE" Yelled kyousei in a rage, stone was about to encase the ninja in stone, making it up his leg then broke into little pieces! What? what happened? Wondered Kyousei! "You haven't figured it out yet? Kyousei, you can't use your Kekkei Genkai on me, because I can halt that, I can halt all of your efforts with those eyes, because i have the same eyes as you, I am apart of your clan, I am... Your father....."

Chapter VII
(The Ninja Revealed: Part 2)

"You're my father? That makes no sense! I saw my father dead and bleeding realistically on the ground!" Kyousei screamed in rage. "How dare you mock my father?!" "I never mocked him, me being dead was all a genjutsu cast by my eyes, you never even saw the real me." The man said. "What about mom? Also, what do you mean I never saw the real you?!" Kyousei asked, confused. "I killed her too, and you haven't" The man stated, while calmly pulling off his mask as the winds blew. Before the man could get his mask all the way off, revealing the cut and burn mark on his face, Yukida appears and punches him about 20 feet into the ground, also causing a giant shockwave that breaks up the ground, especially around where he hit. "I don't want to hear your bullcrap!" Yukida yelled in fury, while holding her fist.

"Fools." A voice which sounded like that man said. Soon after that, Kyousei gets a large gash across his shoulder, and blood shoots up as Kyousei is in a shocked state, and falls to the ground, passed out. "Didn't I tell you, you never seen the real me?!" After that, gashes on Yukida appears, and blood shoots out from them also, as she is easily incapacitated, probably killed. Kyousei still lays on the ground, with eyes wide open, and he suddenly starts to see, but all he see is the unmasked ninja, who is undoubtedly his father. He see's his father put away a katana, and disappear into sky, as everything turns black.

Cyl
05-25-2010, 10:40 PM
Chapter VIII

Despair

It is dark, and I can't feel anything, my body weighs about 100 tons, and it feels like my lungs are barely getting air, and I can hardly breath. My eyes are snapped shut, but I am awoke. I open my eyes, a bit, and my eyes open a bit to a sleeping Yukida. She isn't dead, and that is a relief. She has long bandages over her stomach and her chest, as well as scars on her visible neck. I try to move my head in the opposite direction, but it feels like 50 tons are working against me, and it takes an eternity to reach my destination. Had I been this weak from just one slash? Once I see Uruyad laying safely also, I am kind of at peace, and I start to rest my eyes. I start to dream, to dream of the times me and my teammates bonded

Soon, the dream started turning into a nightmare, with blood being thrown all over the place, and my fathers face entering my head multiple times. His eyes, they're different, did I miss something in our fight? His eyes show layers of brown and red, 5 of them. His pupil of his eye was pitch black, and looked like a black hole. He continued to slash my teammate, as I sat and did nothing but lay motionless, without even being able to track his movements. I cried out to Yukida, or I at least tried, but, I was hopeless. I had lost all confidence, and all hope.

Once I awoke from my terrible nightmare, completely ignoring that Yukida and Uruyad weren't in their beds. I had felt the same way as I did in my nightmare, without confidence, with no hope. I had felt "despair." I got out of my soft bed, which I could feel now, but barely. I exhaustively dragged myself outside the hospital doors, completely ignoring the nurse that was yelling at me to remain in bed. It is stingily cold, and strong cold winds burn my skin in a way. Snow is blowing with this wind, it was obviously it was a blizzard out. I saw igloo like houses around, and people living in ice caps. Yukida and Uruyad appear next to me, and they try to pull me back to the bed, but I break free. "What Village are we in?" I said. "How nice, you couldn't even greet us." Uruyad said. I was happy to hear a familiar voice, and I smirked a bit. I looked up at the hospital, and saw a banner that read "Ice Village Hospital"

I look over to Yukida, who is completely alright, and I put my hands infront of my face. Why am I so weak? I was only hit once, wasn't I? Why am I in such a bad shape? Why is Yukida completely fine, I am both scarred and damaged mentally and physically. I fall to my knees under disappointment, despair, muscle failure, and the cold winds. "Kyousei-Sensei!" Yukida screamed as Uruyad carried me back into the hospital. After he has done that, a doctor walked up to me. "Hello, you should relax, you're not in the condition to be walking around, especially not outside since you're not totally prepared for our cold weather." The doctor told me. "Why? Why am I in such a bad condition?!" I yelled, faintly. "Well, doing our research on the girl, it was obvious she was cut with a katana, but on our research on you, it was a completely different type of sword. We have no idea why, but when you came here, your muscles were seized up, and you had lost a larger amount of blood than the girl, even though she had more gashes and cuts. You only had one." I stared confusingly at the doctor. "Wha, wha?" "Well, your muscles were seized up, they got tight, it was like Tetanus or something. We found some toxin throughout your body, and it was unlike anything we have ever seen before, one drop of it was enough kill a full-grown bull. You however, survived 5 tablespoons worth of it, you're lucky to be alive."


I am in shock, but I doesn't worry about this as I wonder why I am in the Ice Village, one of the Mountains secret allies. "Why am I not in my Villages hospital?" I asked. There was a long moment of silence, and that's when Uruyad said something. "The Village was destroyed."

Teddie
05-26-2010, 06:59 PM
Well you have a basis of a great story. You just have to work on your delivery. It's coming off as way to conversational. Other than that, not bad at all.

Cyl
05-26-2010, 10:11 PM
Well you have a basis of a great story. You just have to work on your delivery. It's coming off as way to conversational. Other than that, not bad at all.
Oh, well I will add more action too the story, I feel like it is necessary. xD
I leave cliffhangers at nearly every chapter though.

Cyl
05-27-2010, 08:26 PM
Chapter IX.

Hopeless

I didn't say anything, but the evidence was in my face, in my eyes, that I had been surprised to the point it seemed I was about to just pass out and die from extreme shock. "I..I don't believe it" I stuttered while stumbling backwards. "It's true, and, almost everyone died, the Yamakage had saved some of the villagers. However, it had cost him his life doing it." The doctor had said while grabbing my shoulder. "So the old geezer is gone?" I said. "Yes, he's gone Kyousei." Once this is said, my head falls, as tears drop to the ground. I then start to whimper a few words. "Who, who did this?" I asked. There was another long pause. After a few minutes of silence, Yukida finally spoken up and said, "Your father." My head shot up instantly, with tears flying off of my face. "MY...My father!" I was enraged, I then started to run, without feeling any sense of weakness, and I go outside into the blistering cold. "Where are you going?! KYOUSEI-SENSEI?!" Yukida yelled out. Kyousei stopped, closed his eyes, and turned around and said while opening his eyes. "To kill..That man" Kyousei said, revealing a new pattern of Tsuchigan.

Cyl
05-27-2010, 10:20 PM
Chapter X
Retribution

Yukida stared motionless into my eyes, the eyes which held no visible pupil. The eyes which were crimson red, and had flames that burned for eternity in each eye. The flame would be considered the pupils of my eyes, I guess, since they are placed where my pupils should be. The doctor stood, truly terrified, as well as Uruyad. Yukida, however, wasn't afraid, but she was obviously sad, and her eyes started to get watery. I don't feel cold anymore, for some reason, it was getting warmer since I opened my eyes, but now, it's completely warm. I disappear into the blizzard as Yukida starts to cry.

I ran, through the blinding blizzard, and never faltered. The snow that hit me, instantly melted, and the water left over from the snow, soaked my clothes, but they dried quickly. I didn't have weather fitting clothes, however. I have regular black sandals, black jogging pants, a black t-shirt, and a headband on my forehead which had the Mountain Villages symbol on it.

After days and nights of traversing through the Land of Snow with no resting, and no sleeping, I entered the Land of Soil. The fire inside me kept me woke, and warm, the fire burned with a desire, a desire to kill the man I once called my father. From this point on, I walked, I know where my old village is naturally, and I work towards that direct. After a few hours of walking, I entire a land that is covered totally in dust. I then notice 5 chakra signatures, and I stop. "Show yourselves, you traitors." Once I say this, 5 men appear from dust blowing in the wind infront of me. "Dust Village Hokori clan huh? I thought all of you would have been killed in the annihilation of the Village Hidden in the Dust."

The scene changes to two men walking in the Land of Soil, wearing black Japanese robes, and black Hakama, and straw roped sandals. One of the men are wearing a Haori, or a white kimono jacket that stretches down to his hip. At the ends of it, a symbol is placed there. "Φ"
On the back of this gentlemen, there is a triangle, with a Japanese number that reads "8" on it. "Hey, Captain, when are we going to get to this Village?" The tall, slim man, with straight, long, blonde hair that runs halfway down his back asked. He always had this mean look on his face, but almost always smirked out of pleasure for some reason. The other one, with the Haori, who is taller than the other man, and has a more calm face than the other one, but he wasn't as slim as him, and had a bald head began to answer. "We'll be there soon, it's not like we have anything to lose, we are Soul Reapers you know."

Taker369
05-27-2010, 10:22 PM
horrible story i hate it actually i liked it. :D

Cyl
05-27-2010, 10:24 PM
horrible story i hate it actually i liked it. :D
T_T
Do you really mean it?
/sniffles.
:lol:

Taker369
05-27-2010, 10:27 PM
yes i hated it .:lol: votes it sucks.

waits for more.

Cyl
05-27-2010, 10:28 PM
yes i hated it .:lol: votes it sucks.

waits for more.
If it sucked, why are you waiting for more? >>

Taker369
05-27-2010, 10:29 PM
good point.:lol:

Cyl
05-31-2010, 10:18 PM
Chapter XI
Secret Rogue.



"Yeah, you're right." The shorter man answered. "I hate that we have to kill that guy!" "We were assigned this mission because we are the best suited for it, we are the ones who handle new Soul Reapers that go rogue." The bald man jokingly said. "You should be used to it, Gouzen." Gouzen looked at his captain, and smirked as he said this. "Right, Captain Derekku, these missions are painful."

I stand before the 5 Hokori clan members, and wait for them to make a move. Not too long after I talked about to annihilation of the Dust Village, one performs hand signs, and claps his hands together and whispers ((Dust Style: Whirling Dust Storm!)) I then notice dust is being blown around, and it a storm ensues. The dust flying through the air with such power threatens to knock me into the air if I lose my footing, and my sight is reduced greatly. One of the men disappear I then feel a pain in my back, and blood drips down from a long slash on my back. "What the hell?!" I then flip back, and I lose sight of the other men completely. More cuts appear all around me, and then, flame appears on the edges of these cuts, but I don't feel pain. The cuts then close, and I stop bleeding. I jump back, withstanding the winds, and I hear something. More cuts appear on my body, even though I haven't seen those guys yet. The fire continuously heals me, and once again, I hear something that I can't make out, and cuts appear on my body again. "What the hell is going on here?!"

Yukida eyes pour out tears, as she continues to scream for her sensei's name. She gets no answer, but cold winds entering through the open door of the hospital. The doctor still stands in shock, and Uruyad gets a grip on reality. Uruyad runs to Yukida and holds her, and whispers. "Everything's going to be alright." Yukida cries in Uruyads arms, and the doctor walks over to the door, and closes it. Meanwhile, a man walks in through the door the doctor just closed, with a Mountain headband, a light skinned face, a jonin jacket, jogging pants, and black sandals. Under the jacket shows a white shirt, that looks as if it were fresh out of the dryer, and Uruyad and Yukida stare at him. "Weritsa-sensei?"

"I didn't come this far to get killed by you traitorous assholes!" I scream out as I hear this whisper something again. This time, I can make ito ut, and I notice the man says ((Secret Hokori Clan Technique: Silent Dust Slash!)) and my eyes get wide. I then smile, and I see a oddly shaped figure in the dust, but it is the same color. "I can see him" I thought. The man slowly comes at me, that means I must mean I can bullet time him, and I raise my blade, Setsuzentaru Tsurugi, and blocks the oncoming slash with ease. The mans face becomes visible when I block his attack, and his eyes widen, and he has this very surprised look on his face. Then, he is lit aflame completely, and before he can scream in agony, he is incinerated, and "dust" turns to "ash." The other 4 are coming at me as well, and my sword sets ablaze and I spin quickly, and a fire tornado engulfs them all, setting them on fire as this devilish look is created on my face. I stand in the middle of 5 piles of ash, and I say "I will, kill my father."

The scene changed back to the two men, still walking towards the village. Derekku then says "Yeah, but this time, we're killing a peculiar person, a person who contains a mix of the energies, Warui Ichibun"

Cyl
12-01-2011, 11:55 PM
Superbump!