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Anbu-Phoenix
07-30-2009, 05:51 PM
Hey forums i made a couple of poems and i thought that you guys might like them

Distance

Far away the light shines bright
Far away and out of sight
The light goes dim by going farther
With every step closer another mile longer
Why don’t I give up?
Why don’t I give in?
Because I wont back down
Il try and try again
I run towards that light as fast as I can
The wind hitting my face like a high-powered fan
After what seemed like miles I get to the light gasping for air
To find out it that that light was never there.


Claustrophobia

Trapped in this box sealed shut
I need something to make a cut
I can’t move and I’m running out of air
Thinking of all the times that I wish we could of shared
But now I die from this lack of air
And at least I was loved by the one that really cares
Now I take my final breath
Only inches from a horrible death
I see a light gleaming through a crack
I see you’re your hand trying to pull me back

Spark
07-30-2009, 05:52 PM
i like it

Anbu-Phoenix
07-30-2009, 05:55 PM
thank you

Anbu-Phoenix
07-30-2009, 06:16 PM
:mrgreen: I'm working on more

Vatanui AKA Pride
07-30-2009, 06:18 PM
I like it. Keep poeming!

Yoshi-Chan
07-30-2009, 06:24 PM
i like 'em.

Anbu-Phoenix
07-30-2009, 06:24 PM
:mrgreen:

Protector
07-30-2009, 06:43 PM
nice poems

Maikeru D. Shinigami
07-30-2009, 06:47 PM
Nice poems, you should check out mine.

http://naruto.viz.com/forum/showthread.php?t=13088

Anbu-Phoenix
07-30-2009, 11:50 PM
thank you both

sasruto
07-31-2009, 12:59 PM
i like them!

ItachiAnbu
07-31-2009, 02:36 PM
These are good.

But maybe you should try a lighter tone? Being a song writer, that's my opinion.

Yoshi-Chan
07-31-2009, 09:14 PM
These are good.

But maybe you should try a lighter tone? Being a song writer, that's my opinion.
Yeesh! And i can play guitar,so waa-laa insta-band. But stilll i like de poems.

Anbu-Phoenix
08-01-2009, 10:14 PM
These are good.

But maybe you should try a lighter tone? Being a song writer, that's my opinion.
I tried that once did not turn out well

Vatanui AKA Pride
08-01-2009, 10:16 PM
How bad?

Anbu-Phoenix
08-01-2009, 10:19 PM
It involved McDonald's