View Full Version : The story of Chin and Sagara (and their Clan)

Ninja of Cao
07-12-2009, 03:34 PM
This is my story. Its about me, and Chin_Tao (he has accepted his role in this story). And how we created the Elemental Clan.

Chapter 1

The beggining:

It all started when I was 14 years old. Me and my brother, Chin, had just arrived at our home village. However, we quickly relised something was not right. The whole village seemed abandoned, and we had only been away for a week. Thick mist were spreading through the village.
"What happened while we were gone? Has this whole place become haunted?" Chin said. I were going to respond that ghosts did not exist, when we saw something moving in the mist.
"Whos there?" Chin shouted at the mist. There were no response. The strange figure walked away and disappeared in the thick mist.
"We should go home." Chin said. I agreed, and we were going to our house. But we could not get inside.
"Why dont the key works?" Chin asked. I didnt know. Chin knocked on the door.
"Hello? Is someone home?" he shout. There was no response. Chin tried to stab a Kunai in the lock to open the door. After about a minute, we got the door open. It was dark in the house, and noone appeared to be home.
Chin and I walked inside the hall.
"Mom? Dad? Sister?" Chin shouted. There were still no response. We searched through the house, but we did not find any sign of them. I walked downstairs while Chin were searching upstairs. When I entered a room in the basement, I saw someone in the room. He had a long, black robe, and a headband with a symbol I had never seen before. The darkness in the room were cloaking his face, but I could see his headband and two grey eyes. He walked towards me and stretched out his hand to my face, and I fell to the floor. But just before I became unconscious, I heard someone whispering two words:
Yan Yuuno
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This was chapter one in my and Chins story. Please leave a reply about what you think of it.

07-12-2009, 03:54 PM
a few spelling mistakes but oh well i like it the ending also very dramatic and intense

Ninja of Cao
07-12-2009, 03:58 PM
I will soon be finished with chapter 2.

Kunoichi of Tao
07-13-2009, 10:52 AM
I cant wait to read the next chapter!

Ninja of Cao
07-13-2009, 12:04 PM
Here is part 2:

Chapter 2

Yan Yuuno:

I woke up with great pain in my head. My brother sat before me.
"What happened?" he asked. I told him about the man, and what he did.
"What is Yan Yuuno?" I asked. Chin looked at me like he thought I was crazy.
"Where have you heard that?"
"I heard a voice whispering it to me before I became unconscious." Chin stood up.
"I think our Sensei has mentioned them." he said. "Some organization of Ninjas."
I asked him about their location. He told me that they have their own village not far from our own. I told him that we should go to that village and try to find out more. Chin agreed. We went out. It was late dawn, but it was still dark in the village because of all the thick mist. We walked a long way until we reached a couple of buildings. Chin kept moving towards a large palace in the middle of the village.
"Where are we going?" I asked, but Chin didnt respond. The door opened when we got close to it, but we didnt saw anyone inside. The door closed behind us. I heard that it locked itself.
"We are trapped." I said. Chin still didnt respond. Suddently, we heard a voice talking to us.
"Why are you here?" the voice asked.
"Is this the Yan Yuuno?" I asked. It became silent. A door at the other side of the room opened itself, and a man appeared. He was dressed the same way as the man in the basement earlier, but he had green eyes, and longer hair.
"What, are you going to join the Yan Yuuno?" he asked and smiled. "You guys look a little too young."
"Hey, we are Chunins." I said.
"Well, that was impressive." he said and kept smile. "Well, are you going to join?"
"We want to find out what happened to our village." Chin said. The man looked at him.
"Oh, your village. Well, we were just tryng to recruit more members." he said.
"Why could you not just ask them?" my brother said.
"We did. But they didnt wanted to join our Clan."
"Why not?" I asked.
"This is too much questions at the time." he said. "All will be explained soon."
"We are not planning on staying here." I said. The man smiled again.
"I am afraid you dont have a choice." he said. With those words, we fell to the ground, unconscious. The last thing I remember is that two zombie-like men were carrying us away.
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Kunoichi of Tao
07-13-2009, 12:07 PM
You really knows how to write thrilling stories.

07-13-2009, 05:26 PM
gah im shaking!!write more this sounds a lot like an undead cult *shudder*

Ninja of Cao
07-14-2009, 05:50 AM
Im soon finished with chapter 3.

Ninja of Cao
07-14-2009, 03:19 PM
Here is part 3:

Chapter 3:

Membership or not?

I woke up in a small room without any windows. It reminded of a prison cell. I turned around and looked for my brother. He was not there. I walked to the door and knocked on it.
"Hello? Is somebody out there?" I shouted. There was no response. By judging the light that was visible through a small hole on the wall, it was early in the morning. I thought that they maybe were still asleep, but suddently, the door opened. The man from yesterday walked inside the room.
"So you are awake now?" he said.
"Were is my brother?" I asked with anger in my voice.
"He is in the cell next to yours." he said. "You know, we only have cells for one person in each."
"I want to see my brother." I said. The man smiled as usual and were pointing out from the room.
"He is in the cell to the right." the man said. "But I dont know if he is awake yet." I walked outside the room and went to the right. I saw more of those zombie-like men guarding the doors. I opened the door, which was unlocked. I saw Chin sitting on the bed with someone else talking to him. He was wearing the same black robe as the other, but he looked different. He had brown hair, and only one eye. The other one were closed and had a long scar over itself. Chin turned his face to me.
"Sagara, what happened to you?" he asked. He looked at my face in a strange way. I touched my face with my hand and felt a scar on my cheek.
"Sorry about that." the man behind me sad. "Our Jiang Si dont understand how to be careful." he looked at the strange guards. "But they are good as guards." Chin stood up.
"What is this all about?" he asked.
"We just want to know if you are going to join the Yan Yuuno, or if we should place you in the torture chamber." the man said and smiled again.
"Doesnt seems like we have any choice." my brother said. We walked outside the room.
"What are we going to do, then?" I asked the man.
"We will see what our leader thinks." he said, before he turned around and walked away. He maked a sign with the hands to us to follow him. We started walking through an endless corridor until we reached a large door. The man knocked.
"Who is it?" a voice asked from the inside.
"Kunemaru, and the new members." he said. The door slowly opened, and we saw the leader of the Yan Yuuno.
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Kunoichi of Tao
07-14-2009, 03:27 PM
Wow. So exciting.

When will you be finished with part 4?

Ninja of Cao
07-14-2009, 03:46 PM
I cannot make any exact dates, but it will probably be in a day or two.

Ninja of Cao
07-15-2009, 06:59 AM
Here is part 4:

Chapter 4

The Leader of Yan Yuuno:

When the door opened, we saw a man, dressed in the same black robe as Kunemaru. He had grey eyes, and black hair, and a headband with a symbol of an eye. It was the man I saw in the basement two days ago.
"Have they accepted membership?" he asked and looked at Kunemaru.
"That depends how you put it." he answered and smiled. "But I think they will prefer membership before torture." their leader turned his face against us.
"Do you join us or not?" he asked.
"I guess we do." we both said. Their leader turned his face back to Kunemaru.
"Well, then." he said. "Give them the Yan Yuuno clothing and weapons." Kunemaru took a few step backwards.
"Will do, Yan Tao." he said and bowed. He turned around and walked out of the room. We followed him. We walked through an endless corridor until we reached another larger door. Kunemaru opened it. We saw many black robes that hanged on the wall, and large boxes, filled with Kunais, Shurikens, needles, Katanas, Nunchakus... more Ninja Weapons that I had ever seen.
"Get dressed and armed." Kunemaru said. "We will meet with Yan Tao again in ten minutes." We did as he said and dressed us in the black robes, and took some weapons from the boxes. When we were finished, we walked outside the room. Kunemaru stood outside.
"Okay, then." he said. "Lets go." We walked through the endless corridors, and reached the leaders room once again. We walked inside, and saw this time not only Yan Tao, but several other Ninjas dressed in the same black robes. Some of them didnt even looked human. Yan Tao looked at us.
"That will have to do." he said. "Get them to the other new members."
"Hey, if we are going to walk through that endless corridor again, I will personally cut your head in half." Chin said and took up a Kunai. Yan Tao didnt reacted.
"Get them to the other new members." Yan Tao repeated. Kunemaru grabbed our arms and started walking away. Once again, we had to go through the surely thousand-meters long corridor. We reached a door, and Kunemaru pulled us inside. He walked away and closed the door. I tried to open it, but it was locked. Chin touched me at the shoulder, and I turned my head around.
"Sister?" I asked, hardly believing my own eyes.
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Kunoichi of Tao
07-15-2009, 07:31 AM
Wow. You must write more of this!

If you are not finished with the next chapter soon, I will get mad and throw a couple of Kunais at you.

Ninja of Cao
07-15-2009, 08:06 AM
May you stop threat me with weapons to make me finish the next chapter?

07-15-2009, 08:24 AM
May you stop threat me with weapons to make me finish the next chapter?

haha its pretty funny.
I wanna read the next chp. too.
SO plz try and hurry.

Ninja of Cao
07-15-2009, 08:29 AM
haha its pretty funny.
I wanna read the next chp. too.
SO plz try and hurry.
Will do.

Ninja of Cao
07-15-2009, 11:12 AM
Here it is, part 5:

Chapter 5

Training of the Yan Yuuno:

"Sister?" I asked, hardly believing my own eyes. "What are you doing here?"
"I were going to ask you the same thing" she said. "What happened?"
"We were going to this place to find out what happened to our village." I said.
"Everyone in the village is here." Our sister, Jun, said. I looked around, and saw almost half the village population were in the large room.
"Where is the others?" I asked.
"Probably in the torture chamber." Jun said and shaked her head.
"We must free them." I said. Jun looked at me.
"They would only come after us again, if we even succed." she said. We talked to our sister and the other villagers for a long time, until we fell asleep late at the night.

When I woke up in the next morning, everyone else were already awake. At several moments, someone of the Yan Yuuno picked a couple of villagers to some training. Suddently, he picked me and Chin. We stood up and followed him out. We walked throught another corridor, and reached a large, open training field.
"First, you will use throw weapons at the targets." he said and pointed at some rings painted on a tree. My brother and I throwed needles and Kunais as good as we could at the targets. We succed very well.
"Now, you will destroy the targeted objects." he said, and pointed at two large stones, around 50 meters away.
"You can use whatever you want, but you must stay at this point." he said. Chin started. He maked the Ninja Signs for Chakra Blast and throwed the large energy ball at one of the stones. The stone exploded. I were using my ability to control earth, and maked the stone exploded.
"Last test for today, is 1 vs 1 match." our trainer said. "You will fight each other, to the death."
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Nikito Tao
07-15-2009, 11:45 AM
Wow. Cool story.

07-17-2009, 07:33 AM
Dun dun dunnnnn

Ninja of Cao
07-17-2009, 08:31 AM
Here is part 6:

Chapter 6

A battle of brothers:

I saw my brother stand before me, like I had often seen him. But this time, it was not as a friend, is was as an enemy. We both knewed that we had no choice. We had to fight each other, to the death.
“Im sorry, brother.” He said and maked familiar Hand Signs. “Lighteye!” he said, and his eyes turned shining white. I saw that this was the second stage, the stage that foresees enemy attacks. I maked the same. He took battle position. I did the same. Suddently, he started to run against me. We met each other in a hard battle of Taijutsu. I knewed that Chin were stronger than me in both Taijutsu and Ninjutsu, and he could resist Genjutsu. And he was far too familiar with our Kekkei Genkais. So what were left to use? I throwed several Kunais and Shurikens at him, none of them hit. I managed to hit him with a kick in his face, but he seemed to be unaffected. He kept attacking me with Taijutsu. It was hard to defend myself against his attacks, but I saw that he eld back. He pulled out his Katana and striked at me. I managed to avoid the blade, but still gained a small scar on my arm. Chin punched me hard in the chest and I fell to the ground. Chin maked the Ninja Signs for Chakra Blast. I knewed that this was the end. I closed my eyes, and turned my face from him. I heard an explosion, and I could feel the shockwave from it. But I were not dead. When I opened my eyes, I saw our trainer, dead. Chin took my arm and pulled me up from the ground.
“Come.” He said. “We must free the others:” We ran through the corridor again. It still felt endless. Several Jiang Si guards tried to stop us, but Chin destroyed them with ease. We reached the door, and opened it. But we could not believe what we saw. Everyone were dead. Our sister, our cousins, everyone from the village. At the other side of the room, we saw someone moving towards us. It was Yan Tao.
“What have you done?!” I shout at him.
“I gave them a chance to defend themselves.” He said. “I gave them all the weapons they would need before I fought them.” I reacted quickly. I throwed three Shurikens at him. They fell to the ground without a single move from him. He pointed at us with a Katana.
“Shadow Sharingan.” He said, and his eyes turned into a form I had never seen before. He looked at us. “Pain Illusion.” He said. We suddently felt great pain and fell to the floor. It felt like thousands of swords were stabbed in us.
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07-17-2009, 03:09 PM
great chp. sagara!
Can't wait for the next one.
oh and u misspelled a word.
U misspelled the word held, u ust have been writing fast to miss the h in held.
U wrote eld.
it sort of makes sense so u don't have to change it.
just letting u no.

07-17-2009, 03:43 PM

Ninja of Cao
07-18-2009, 04:39 PM
The next chapter will be finished soon.
However, there are probably not more than 2, or 3 upcoming chapters.

Nikito Tao
07-19-2009, 07:41 PM
When is the next chapter finished?

Nikito Tao
07-19-2009, 07:41 PM
Your story is really cool.

Ninja of Cao
07-24-2009, 12:09 PM
This is the last chapter in my story:

Chapter 7

Fight against Yan Tao:

“I don’t understand...” Chin said and stood up. “I couldn’t resist his Genjutsu?” I felt that the illusion were over. But I could still feel the pain in my body.
“My Shadow Sharingan is not normal Genjutsu.” Yan Tao said and lowered his sword.
“What was it then?” I asked. He looked at us.
“Regular Genjutsu attacks the five senses.” He said. “My Shadow Sharingan does not attack the senses; it attacks the soul of the opponent.”
I ran against him, ready to cut him apart with my Katana. Just when my blade touched his body, he disappeared in thick, dark smoke.
“Behind you!” Chin shouted. I turned around, and could barely avoid an attack from hitting my neck. I felt a wound in my arm and saw my white Kimono be colored red around the wounded point. Chin attacked Yan Tao and used the Chakra Blast technique, and launched the massive energy at Yan Tao. He didn’t avoid the attack. The huge explosion destroyed half the room, but Yan Tao was unaffected. He looked at us with his Shadow Sharingan. We were pushed into the wall, like if an explosion had appeared right in front of us. Yan Tao walked towards us. Suddenly, a Kunai appeared from nowhere and were just a centimeter from hitting Yan Tao. We saw our sister, she had survived. She attacked him with her two Katanas, but he avoided the attack with ease.
“Run!” she shout at us. “I’ll take care of him!”
I stood up and was prepared to attack Yan Tao, but I didn’t move. Suddenly, I turned around and ran out of the room together with Chin. We saw our sister behind us attacking Yan Tao.
“How do we get out?!” I shouted. Chin didn’t responded, and did the hand signs for summoning Jutsu.
“Summoning Jutsu!” he shouted. “The Elemental Dragon!” a huge dragon appeared in front of us. We jumped up on its back and looked around. We saw our sister running towards us. She seemed to be injured, but she managed to jump on the dragon.
“What happened?” I asked.
“He still lives.” She said. “I couldn’t defeat him.” We fled on the dragon, from the palace, from the city.
“Where are we going?” She asked. “If we return to our village, they will just come after us again.”
“What if we created our own village?” Chin said. “Created a new clan?”
“Yes.” I said. “Our family is dead, and our clan is destroyed.” Our sister agreed. We flew on the dragon over endless countries and villages, until we reached a place to build up a new clan. Even if it ends, it will only be a new beginning.

The end.

I put the papers aside. I had been writing for weeks to explain the story of how our clan was created. Chin entered the room.
“How is it going?” he asked. I gave him the papers.
“There.” I said. “The story about how we created our clan.” Chin was quickly reading through the pages. I looked at him.
“It was over 70 years ago.” I said. “You will be rebirth in five hundred years, but I will not.”
“The death is only another path.” He said. “I hope that you will find happiness in your new path.”
“Now, I have written the story of the Tao Clan.” I said. “I have nothing more to do here.”
“Thank you, my brother.” Chin said. I closed my eyes, and died. The last thing I heard in this life was:
“Good luck, Sagara.”
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The End

Kunoichi of Tao
07-24-2009, 12:56 PM
Wow, this was a really thrilling story. But what do you mean by last part?
Does that mean that you wont write anything more???

Kunoichi of Tao
07-24-2009, 12:58 PM
You really know how to write cool stories. Can you write a new one?

Kunoichi of Tao
07-24-2009, 01:01 PM
If you write a new story, what will it be about?
This story was really cool, but there is one thing I dont understand:

You died in the story, so how can you be here? Are you a ghost or something???

Ninja of Cao
07-24-2009, 01:04 PM
Not really. I have returned from the dead.
That doesn't mean I'm a Zombie. I have been rebirth somehow.

Ninja of Cao
07-25-2009, 07:28 AM
And I think I will write something more. But I'm not sure when I will write it or what it will be about.

Kaoru Tao
08-16-2009, 05:13 AM
Wow. This was a very good story. Plz, write more of this.